Abandoned
by 1HendersonChick
Summary: *Summary change* "The Knights have a son about my age who is the most handsome being I have ever seen...But he would never be friends with a freak like me." Logan lives a horrible life with horrible parents. What happens when Kendall gets caught up in a situation with Logan's mom while trying to protect him? *Warning inside* Strong Abuse/Cutting/Foul Language KOGAN!
1. The Boy Across the Street

**A/N: I had a dream about this, so why not turn it into a story?**

***Warning* May contain triggering contents of abuse. Nothing too-too bad but still, Read at your own will.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own the BTR dudes :(**

I woke up cramped and tried to stretch my legs. The room was dark and I was alone. I must've fallen asleep while trying to block out the noise. I ran to my sanctuary when I first heard the banging start. It was an all-too familiar occasion in this house. I rub my eyes and blink a few times, trying to wipe away the sleep. Pressing my ear to the door, I check to see if the yelling has calmed down. It has. I move the clothes aside on the rack and open the closet door. It's still sunny outside. I look out my window and see the neighbors outside. The Knights have a son about my age who is the most handsome being I have ever seen; captain of our school's hockey team, loved by everyone in the town. But he would never be friends with a freak like me. I start to get that feeling of self-pity in my stomach again and I leave the window. The clock says 6:30pm so I crack open my bedroom door. I walk down the stairs to the kitchen and look at the mess my parents have made. I start to pick up the pans and hang them back on the rack. I know what will happen if I don't. I pick up the papers and sort them out to see which are trash and which are important, which are my mother's, which are my father's. I pick up the chairs that have fallen on their sides and return them to their place.

"You okay kiddo?" my father asked me. He caught me off guard and I can't tell where the voice is coming from so I look like a deer caught in the headlights.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I said. I try to avoid saying anything that could be used against me later on. My father comes out of the bathroom wiping his hands. He has scratches up his arms. I just looked at him not knowing what else to do.

"Why don't you go get washed up? I'll start dinner," he said to me. Immediately complying, I head for the bathroom. I turn the faucet on and soak my hands in the warm water. My mind seems to wander and I find myself analyzing every crack and crevice my fingers and knuckles possess. When I look up I get instantly disgusted. Who is that person looking back at me? Why does he look like that? What is his story? I add soap and rinse, and dry my hands on a towel. When I return to the kitchen my father has one of the pots that were just on the floor, on the stove with some water in it. It's not really a perfect circle anymore. I sit at the empty counter and just wait.

"It's gonna be a few minutes bud. Why don't you go introduce yourself to the neighbors? They're all out there," my father said.

"I don't know, do you think they'll like me?" I asked.

"Not until you introduce yourself," he said. I look out the living room window from my seat and see the kids running around their front yard. My legs start to move towards my front door as my mind mentally prepares myself for the humiliation I know is inevitable. I open the door, close it behind me and walk down the three stairs that hang from my front porch. Not knowing what else to do, I just stand there. Staring. Watching the kids run around chasing each other. I don't see him though. The one that makes my heart beat faster. I can feel it thumping loudly as I pictured him in my mind. Soft smile, kind of tall but not too lanky, always laughing, and those perfect hazel eyes that can see right into my soul. I envied everyone around him. The sound of a car horn pulls me out of my thoughts.

"Hello! Get the hell out of the way. What are you doing?" I was unintentionally blocking my mother's parking spot, that's what I was doing. I step onto the grass where I am safe from causing more problems.

"Take these inside, I don't want to look at your father's face," she handed me the grocery bags and I took them gently, so not to get her upset over something else, and brought them to my father, taking one final glance at the house across the street.

"Your mother's home I take it," my father said to me. I look at him quizzically. "Your face says it all." I manage to crack a smile slightly and that makes my father do the same. He took out a box of spaghetti and poured it into the pot.

"Logan, wash your hands before you handle food," my mother said, walking straight from the front door to her room downstairs.

"I already did," I responded. I bit my tongue instantly but it was too late. The words were already out. No going back.

"Excuse me?" My mother said, turning on her heel. I hesitated a bit but continued anyway.

"I had already washed my hands before you showed up," I said, trying to sound as composed as possible.

"Did I ask you when the last time you washed your hands was?" she asked, walking toward me. I looked at my dad who looked at my mom.

"No ma'am," I said.

"Go wash up," she snapped, grabbing my cheeks with one hand. I wait until she releases her grip and I head for the bathroom again. While washing my hands for the second time in about 20 minutes the only thing I can do is pray it doesn't happen again. That they don't fight again. Thankfully, when I return to the kitchen, my mother is gone. Probably to change in her room, to go hook up with her personal trainer. My father is outside watering the garden and there is only one plate of food and one drink sitting on the counter. I look at the clock. 7:03pm. My father's "leave me alone" time. I'm not allowed to talk to my father after 7:00pm. He claims I get too emotional and needy. Anything that happens after that time is on me, and it's up to me to handle it. I sit silently at the counter and twirl the noodles around my fork. Carefully, I slurp up my dinner, and gulp down the milk, listening to the ticking clock on the wall. I picked up the dishes carefully and placed them in the sink and turned the water on to rinse them. I look out the window again. The kids are gone.

"What are you doing?" my mother asked me.

"Just washing my dishes," I responded.

"It doesn't take ten years to wash a dish Logan. Are you gonna pay this water bill?" my mother's voice was rising. I think she was madder at the fact she couldn't get the earring in her ear but still.

"No, ma'am. I'm sorry," I said.

"Damn right you're sorry. Get upstairs," she ushered me out of the room and I hurried up the stairs. Once in my room, I close the door quietly and go over to my desk. I glance out the window and see him walk towards his house. When he turns to close his front door I see his beautiful face. For a half of a second my heart and mind are racing, my blood pressure rising. I can feel my ears and cheeks getting hotter by the second. And then he's gone, but it was enough to at least keep away tonight's forthcoming nightmares.

**How do you think this went? More chapters to come. And if you're following "Don't Forget About Me," the last few chapters are on the way. Review?**


	2. A Light in the Darkness

**Disclaimer: Don't own BTR**

Mornings are a different story here in the Mitchell household. My dad cooks breakfast…sometimes, while my mom complains of the many tasks she needs to get done by the end of the day. I try to shower myself if I didn't get the chance to do so the night before, which just so happens to be the case today and I always try to cram in some extra studying whenever I can. My parents tend to get a little upset when my grades are anything short of perfect. And by parents, I mean my mother. That's why my mother and father got in an argument yesterday. I brought home my performance card and they saw I got 2 B+s, one in Anatomy and one in European Geography. Somehow the 5 As I received weren't that important. My mom flipped but my dad didn't think it was too bad so they started arguing. I'm used to yelling in the house but when I heard the slapping and things being thrown, I went to the closet just to be safe.

The smell of toast and butter made its way up to my room and made my mouth water onto my textbook. I looked at the clock on my desk. 7:15am. I guess it's safe to check. I put the textbook on my desk and peer out the window. I don't see him, but the car is still there. Putting my ear against my door, another morning ritual, I check if anything's going on downstairs. Seems safe to me. I open my door and looks towards the upstairs bathroom. The door is closed which means my mom is in there powdering her face. I tiptoe down the stairs so not to disturb her. You'd be surprised the things that get her mad.

"Morning buddy, breakfast is on the counter," my father said to me. He's reading the paper from his usual spot in the chair by the window in the living room. My nose was right. Toast with butter, and orange juice. Man do I love toast. There's just something about it that warms my heart. Like the kid across the street. I feel my ears start to get hot again.

"You're gonna have to find a ride home today son. I got called into work today," my father said.

"You can't come get me?" I ask.

"Sorry bud. Why don't you ask the neighbors if you can hitch a ride with them?" he asked.

"Okay, I guess," There's no use in starting an argument.

"Ugh, Logan do you always have to make a mess when you eat?" my mother asked me as she entered the kitchen. She grabbed the orange juice from the fridge and filled a glass for herself.

"I'm sorry, mom. I'll clean it up when I'm done," I say biting into my toast.

"Excuse me?" she asked. I finished chewing before I answer her. No use in starting another argument.

"I'll…I'll clean it up now," I said.

"Well you better," she said. I grab a dishrag off the stove and wipe up the crumbs around my plate, and wipe the ring around my orange juice cup.

"The coasters are in the cupboard, Logan," My father said to me not taking his eyes off the paper. It's like he knew. I finish my orange juice in one gulp though, to avoid dirtying the coasters and starting another problem. I wash my dishes, quickly this time, and return upstairs to grab my backpack. The clock on my desk says 7:30 which means I've got a half hour to get to school. Good, I've got plenty of time. I grab the books off my desk and put them in my backpack. I take a quick glance across the street too. Don't see him. No surprise there. I don't usually see him in the morning before school. But when I get home, if I'm lucky I can sometimes catch him getting out of his mom's minivan.

"Logan!" I heard my mom yell. I dropped my backpack at the sound of her voice. Oh no. I think of all the possible things I could have done on my way back downstairs.

"Yes, mom?" I asked her, a little quieter than normal.

"Do you plan on keeping your father waiting all morning for you? Do you plan on paying for his gas?" I looked towards the chair and saw that he was gone.

"He didn't tell me he was ready yet," I replied. My mother raised her eyebrows at me. "But I'm ready now, so I'll just go meet him out there." I said. Good save. I head out the front door to leave. "Bye mom," I said over my shoulder.

"Don't slam the door on your way out!" she yelled back to me. I guess it's better than her usual insults. I'll take it.

"Sorry dad, I didn't know you were ready," I said getting into the car.

"I wasn't. I just didn't want to deal with your mother," he said laughing. I laughed too. But not too loud. You never know when she's listening.

(Later)

"Alright bud, try to have a good day today alright?" my dad said as we pulled up to my school. I sighed heavily knowing exactly what he means. I'm sort of a target here at school. It's the only high school in our neighborhood and all the kids on the streets surrounding my house go to it. I guess I'm not the most popular sixteen year old and the kids here seem to pick up on that. Oh who am I kidding? This place is hell.

"Okay dad," I replied. I got out of the car and walked up the path to the big double doors. Inside, it was like your typical TV high school: teens running around yelling, cussing at the teachers, throwing stuff, throwing food, making weird animal noises, and most of all picking on the ones who were smaller than them. I was a prime target. Only standing 5'4" at sixteen years old, I was a laughing stock of the whole school. Even freshman who were smaller than me picked on me. I just tried not to let it bother me. Instead, I put all of my attention into my school work. Not even 10 seconds being in the building the names start to begin.

"Hey, what's up freak?" Some kid asked me. I just nod my head in his direction.

"Weirdo," another kid called. A group of girls are blocking my locker.

"Excuse me," I said quietly, rubbing the back of my neck.

"Gross," one of the girls said. They walked away giggling to each other. When I put my backpack in my locker I quickly headed to my first class.

I got in a few minutes before the bell rang. It was Mr. Lang's class. English. One of my favorites. Mainly because Mr. Lang is like the nicest teacher in the whole school in my opinion. Others may beg to differ. But, if you do what you're supposed to, he'll treat you with respect.

"Alright class, let's begin." Mr. Lang said, walking in the class with a briefcase. He closed the door behind him. "Today we start our group assignments so everyone pair up with someone." I don't even bother asking people to partner up with me anymore so I just stare at my desk and look over my agenda for the day.

"Crap," I mutter under my breath. I have gym today.

"Well Logan, looks like you're with me again," Mr. Lang said. I collect my things and sit at the desk next to his. I'd rather work with him anyway. Someone who actually likes me.

(Later)

For lunch there are chicken breasts. Even though I'd rather a hamburger, I take it anyway. You never know when your last meal will be. I walk through the aisle buffet-style and pick what I want to eat. Not much of it looks edible but beggars can't be choosers I guess. I pick up a chicken breast, a side of what looks like rice, and peas. I grab milk and look for a spot to sit. Lunch is one of the most awkward, uncomfortable times at school for me. I never know where to sit. But the good part is, he is at my lunch. He sits with his friends at the table in the back. They are always laughing and having a good time, even on the worst days. Every day I want to sit there with them, but my legs go towards the gym locker room. I sat in my usual seat: the bench near the showers. The gym is empty today, thank God, so I sit and eat in silence. I can hear the noise from in here, probably because it's just a room away. When I finished my food I pack up the tray and returned to the cafeteria to dump the trash. I checked in the back of the room towards him. He's so perfect. So perfect.

"Watch it, loser," someone yelled.

"You watch it," I said, as passively as I could. The look on his face was scary. Luckily I was saved by the lunch bell. I slipped out of the cafeteria as fast as I could without getting in trouble. When I got to my locker I grabbed the rest of my books out.

"Hey!" the kid yelled to me. He must have followed me to my locker.

"Hi. I'm sorry about in there," I said quietly, fear taking over me.

"Get over here," he said, more like growled. I guess I didn't move in time because he grabbed my arms and held them behind my back while another kid dumped his tray on me. I'm soaked in milk and peas and other food scraps. "Next time, do what I tell you, got it?!" I nod my head vigorously in compliance, bits of rice and peas falling out of my hair. I ran past him and into a nearby bathroom. Tears start to well up in my eyes, but not because I'm hurt or anything. I'm just embarrassed. I went into a stall and searched in my pocket for my best friend. My only friend. I pull out the sharp piece of razor and look at it in the light. I lift my shirt and slowly, I trace a line down my torso. I closed my eyes and winced at the pain. After a few minutes of self-pity I grabbed some tissue and wiped the droplets of blood that surfaced from the wound. I wiped away my eyes as well. When I left the bathroom, that kid and his friend were still there waiting for me. "Aw da wittle baby is cwying. Does da baby need him mommy?" the kid and his buddy laugh as he pushed me down on the floor. "You know what babies get when they do something wrong?" He asked me. I didn't want to know so I squeeze my eyes shut. I feel a punch to my face, followed by another one. And another one. I cry out in pain when I feel a foot to my gut. I feel a crowd gathering around me. But as soon as it started, it stopped.

"Hey, you leave him alone!" I hear someone yell. I know that voice. It's his voice. His beautiful voice. Even angry it's still angelic. I open my eyes to see him pulling the two boys off of me. I just sat there in awe and watched the whole scene unfold. "You guys better knock it off, or else," he warned.

"Or else what?" the boys mocked in unison.

"Or else you'll have to deal with me," He held up his hockey stick for emphasis. "And I mean it. Do you know what a hockey stick feels like when it's shoved up your ass?" The boys looked at each other.

"Hey man, cool it, we'll leave him alone," one of the kids said holding up his hands in defense.

"You better," he said. The kids ran off when the bell rang, and the crowd around me disbursed too.

"You okay?" he asked me. I just looked at him. I didn't know what to say. This all happened so quickly. He offered me his hand, which, with all the strength I had, I took. He helped me to my feet. He looked at me questioningly. Probably because I haven't answered him yet.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I reply.

"You should get your nose looked at by the nurse. Want me to walk you there?" Oh my God. Another question. How do I answer him? Just do it Logan.

"No, that's okay. I'm all right," I replied. Huh? Clearly I'm not all right. He wants to walk me to the nurse!

"Well if you won't got to the nurse at least take these," he said and handed me some gauze and bandages. "My mom over packs the first aid kit," he said smiling. That smile. That face. My cheeks are getting hot again, and I can hear my heartbeat in my ears. I just took them not knowing what else to do.

"Hey, do you kids have hall passes?" A teacher asked walking by.

"Yep, we're all set," he said. We don't even have hall passes and the teacher believed him.

"Well, hurry on, get to class," he said walking away.

"He's probably right, I should get outside. The team's got practice," He nodded to his stick in reference. I shook my head. "I'll see you again sometime, hey?" he hit my shoulder with a smile and walked away. He touched me. I could hit the floor right now. He freaking touched me. I gathered my books and finished the school day with a breeze, the smile never leaving my face.

(Later)

Okay, so the smile left my face. It's thundering out. And raining, hard. I completely forgot my dad said he couldn't give me a ride home. I use my backpack as an umbrella and walk fast down the road leading to my house. A car pulled up next to me and beeped.

"Hey!" A voice shouted over the claps of thunder. "Do you want a ride home sweetie?" It was Mrs. Knight from across the street. The kid's mom. I stand there debating. "You're gonna catch a cold honey, jump right in. The door to her minivan opened up automatically and inside I see him and another boy.

"Hey!" he yelled to me, smiling.

"Hi," I managed to get out. I sat on the seat next to the kid I'm not familiar with.

"I realized I forgot to tell you my name earlier. I'm Kendall," he said, reaching his hand over from the front seat.

"I took it in my own and shook it. It was soft, yet calloused at the same time. I had to control the butterflies building up in my stomach.

"I'm Logan," I said.

"Nice to meet ya Logan. I'm Carlos," the unfamiliar boy said to me. I shook his hand too.

"My house isn't too far from here ma'am," I said.

"Oh please, honey, call me Jennifer," she replied. I smiled.

"Ours isn't either," Kendall said.

"I know," I said quietly. Carlos had a funny look on his face. "I mean, I know now." When I tell Jennifer my address she knows what I mean.

"Oh, we're neighbors!" She exclaimed.

"I've never seen you around before. I don't think I've seen you in my life to be honest," Kendall said, looking forward.

"Yeah, we just moved in recently," I said.

"Oh, you must be the Mitchells. Welcome to the neighborhood," she said with a smile. I smiled too. We pulled up to Kendall's house and got outside.

"Thanks for sticking up for me today," I said to Kendall, holding out my hand.

"No problem, see ya around," He takes my hand in his again. The butterflies return. I nod my head.

I ran across the street and wiped my feet on the rug on the porch before entering the house, and I tuned to take one last look and my new friend, Kendall before going inside.

**Thanks to the two people for the guest reviews on the first chapter! ily! :)**


	3. A Broken Nose and a New Love Gained

**Disclaimer: Don't own BTR**

I take off my shoes and gently leave them by the door. I hang my backpack on the hooks to dry. I also grab some paper towels and lay them out on the floor under the backpack so it doesn't drip. My socks glide smoothly as I drag my feet over to the fridge.

"Who's in there?" I heard my mother ask as I open the door to the fridge.

"Logan," I said. She doesn't respond. This is weird for my mother to accept an answer from me and not question it. "Mom?" I asked.

"What are you doing home from school so soon?" she asked me, poking her head out of her bedroom door.

"I got a ride home from the neighbors," I said, motioning to Kendall's house over my shoulder.

"All right, well, go upstairs then," she said. That's where I was going anyway so I headed for my room. It's nice to not get in arguments with her sometimes. When I got to my room I looked out the window by my desk and sighed happily. Kendall. That name suits him. Even with the rain pouring down, the sight of Kendall's house knowing he's my friend is still beautiful. Wait. He is my friend right? Did he say he was my friend?

"_No problem, see ya around." _

Oh no. He didn't say he was my friend. Kendall isn't my friend. He hates me. I knew it. There's no way he would want to be friends with me. What if he heard my parents fighting? That's what it is. I should have known. Nothing good ever happens to me.

"Logan!" A pang of worry hits me in the gut and I swallow hard at my mother's harsh tone. "Logan!" I run down the stairs as quickly as I could, skipping one and almost tumbling down the flight.

"Yes mom?" I asked.

"Get over here," she said threateningly. Fear took over my body, and I felt my hands begin to tremble.

"Did I do something wrong mom?" I asked softly.

"Did I do something wrong mom?" she mimicked. That's a dead giveaway that I did do something wrong.

"I'm really sorry mom," I pleaded. Slowly, my legs made it over to her by the front door.

"You're really sorry? Well, I guess that makes everything fine then," I hated when my mom used sarcasm on me. It made me feel dumb.

"What did I do?" I asked her.

"Why don't you ask that damn bag of yours?" she pointed towards the door. My backpack had dripped and soaked through the paper towels I left there.

"I'm really sorry mom. I was going to clean them up. I just forgot. You told me to go upstairs,"

"Umm why are you still talking to me?" she asked. I went to my backpack and picked up the sopped paper. I carried it over to the waste bucket, but it was dripping the whole way there. "Jesus, can you do anything right?" My mother swung her arm back and like a catapult it snapped back and hit me in the face, making my nose spew blood for the second time today. I stuck out my hands to break my fall but instantly cupped my nose once I hit the ground.

"Oh, get up you ass! You're overreacting. I barely touched you! You're just like your father," she spilled insult after insult and I just let her. My nose was throbbing way too much for me to care right now. "Oh poor you. Get upstairs you worthless thing! Looks like I'll have to do this too, like I don't already do enough for you." I stood up still cupping my nose and just looked at her. "Get out of here, you make me sick."

"Can I go to the bathroom first mom?" I asked.

"Did I say go to the bathroom? I said get up stairs, now." I pointed to my nose in emphasis but that just got her madder. She started to chase me around the house and I immediately ran out the sliding doors in the kitchen. "Ugh, you're lucky I have a meeting tonight. I am not getting my hair wet for you!"

I ran in my backyard and climbed up the cherry tree. Probably the worst place to go in weather like this, but as it's between this and my mother; I'm taking my chances with the thunderstorm. The tree is very sticky with goo and the rain isn't helping much. I decide it's best for me to wait under the tree. Climbing back down, I rest my head in my hands and sigh heavily. I can't see Kendall's house from under the tree either. My mother's car pulls out of the driveway. She must be off to her "meeting." I took this as my chance to get back inside. Running for my life, I made it back to the sliding doors. Locked. Figures. I ran around the house and checked the front door. Locked. Thanks a lot mom. Although I guess I'm not shocked. Leaving the doors unlocked would show that she cared, which evidently, she does not. The only thing I can think to do is go back under the tree to hide. The thunder seems to be getting louder and the lightning flashes more frequent. I sat in the fetal position and covered my ears, trying to get in my happy zone that I get in when my parents fight. Soon enough, the sounds cease.

(Later)

The rain is falling in little droplets and the sun is kind of poking out of the clouds. I can tell the sun is setting. I sat up and stretched my legs and rub my eyes. My nose is very sore.

"Dad's home," I said barely audible. I see his car in mom's parking spot. I ran up to the sliding doors and saw my dad in his chair watching TV. I knocked quietly. The last time I knocked on these doors they broke, and my mother made me spend all the money I had to buy new ones. She ended up buying new ones anyway, so my money was completely wasted. My dad saw me and unlocked the doors without saying a word to me.

"Dad? Are you mad at me too?" I asked him. He just taps his watch. 7:12pm. I'm not allowed to talk to him. I just took my shirt off and placed it in the hamper in the bathroom. I did the same with my pants. I returned to the living room shivering in my boxers and my dad was back to watching his show. It was about some people repossessing a dude's car. I tried not to watch too much though. It wasn't my time to watch. The last time I watched TV during someone else's time, my mother made me do the grocery shopping alone, without my father's car. I had to carry everything home, and the grocery market is like 3 miles away. I guess anything's better than what happens when I get home after curfew.

"Dad, is it all right if I sit here with you? I promise not to talk to you," I said. He just pointed towards upstairs. I sighed. Sometimes it feels like my parents just don't want me around. But I know that's not the case with my dad. We do get along, just not after 7pm.

(Later)

"Okay, so chromosomes are divided into two equal sets in the nucleus, each containing its own nucleus," I tried to get the information to stick in my brain by repeating the sentence out loud. I just can't concentrate. My parents are fighting downstairs because when my mother returned, my dad got mad and accused her of cheating. She flipped out, even though I am even aware of what she's doing. When she says she's got a session with her personal trainer, she's hooking up with him, either going to a movie together, or doing who knows what at his place. I start to hear footsteps coming up the stairs. My eyes dart to the clock on my desk. 12:43am. Oh no. The rules are, on school nights, I'm to be asleep by 11. I closed my textbook and jumped into my bed, ruffling the blanket trying to get under the covers. Then I realize, I left my light on. I decide to just play it through though; act like I just fell asleep with the light on. Either way, I'm getting busted.

"His light is still on," I heard my mother say. She probably sees it coming from the crack under my door. Her voice is followed by a knock. I don't dare to move. I hear my door squeak open. I bite my lips and hold my breath as tight as I could, fearing I would move. The door closed and the footsteps are coming closer and closer, my ability to stay still hanging on for dear life. I want so badly to run into my closet, but then they'd know where I hide. Just when I am about to sell myself out and beg for forgiveness for staying up late I feel a hand on my face. A finger softly stroking my cheek. My father. He continued this for a few minutes then he kissed my nose, tucked me in, shut my light off, and left. Even well after 7pm he cared.


	4. My Secret is Out

**A/N: I am honestly shocked at how many of you like this story. Thanks for all the new follows and faves :) **

**Disclaimer: Don't own the BTR guys**

I woke up in a good mood for some reason. It must have been the kiss my dad gave me last night. I guess it just helped me sleep, knowing that my father actually cares about me. I guess I kind of already knew that deep down he did. But sometimes he acts like my mother, especially when she's around. It's like he's trying to hide the fact that he likes me; like my mother will get mad at him for it. She probably will.

"Good morning dad," I said sitting down in the living room.

"Morning son," my dad said, looking up from his paper. I felt his eyes still on me even when I looked away. My eyes searched for my mom; to see if she was standing behind me or something.

"Did I do something wrong dad?" I asked.

"No, it's just your eyes," he said. "I think we should get your nose checked out Logan. Your eyes have blackened."

"I have black eyes? But I got hit in the nose. How does that make any sense?" I asked, crossing my eyes trying to look at them only getting myself dizzy in the process. My dad chuckled as he came over to me.

"It's from the trauma to your head. You're bruised pretty badly," he said lightly touching around my eyes. I tried to make this moment last as long as it could. I typically try to get as much attention from my father as I possibly can. Even a simple stroke of a cheek or kiss on the nose is enough attention for me to keep believing he cares. "We should probably check you in Logan."

"But its Saturday," I said.

"The emergency room is open seven days a week," he said.

"No, but its mom's Saturday," I pointed out. Dad's face takes on a sudden look of realization. My parents pretty much own the weekends here in the Mitchell home. Whenever it's their weekend, we have to do what's on their schedules. Every other weekend my parents switch off. Today happens to be my mother's and if we don't do exactly what she has planned… I shudder just thinking of it.

"I'll talk to your mother," he said leaving the room. I worry about my father when he talks to my mom. She is capable of doing anything to anybody. She doesn't care what the situation is. If something happens that she doesn't like, she'll make a scene and let everybody within a 50 mile radius know that she's pissed.

"Your mother wants you to stay inside today," he said, reentering the living room.

"But, I wanted to go see the neighbors today," I whined.

"Well, I'm sure you'll see them around school on Monday,"

"But I have to ask Kendall if he's still my friend," I said.

"You introduced yourself?" my father asked.

"Yeah, sort of," I said.

"How sort of?" he asked. I didn't really want to get in detail about what happened yesterday.

"Well, he came up to me first," I said. That wasn't a total lie. He did come up to me. Just not in the way dad thinks.

"That's good!" he said. "So did you make friends with him?"

"I think so. He didn't really say it. That's why I wanna go over there," I said.

"Well, if he comes over here that's fine," dad said. "I just think your mother's afraid someone will see your marks." I frown at this. This wouldn't be the first time I missed out on something just because someone might find out what goes on in this house

"Okay," I said sadly. I think my dad notices my attitude and he frowns a bit. "But dad, what's the difference if I go there or he comes here? Either way he's gonna see my face."

"The difference is what your mother wants to happen," he said firmly. "She wants you in so you're staying in."

"But these aren't even from her. Some boys at school punched me because I was in their way," I said.

"Well, regardless. I've got to run to the market. You go on up to your room alright?"

"This whole thing sucks!" I said. I just blurted it out. I didn't mean to say it out loud. It was supposed to stay a thought. My dad didn't do anything though. He just looked at me. I winced into a flinch in anticipation but nothing happened. I slowly opened my closed eyes and saw my mother had entered the room.

"What did he say?" my mother asked my dad.

"This whole thing sucks," he recited.

"I'm so sorry mom," I said desperately. But she didn't touch me. She remained composed and collected...for about half a second. Instead she turned on her heel, went over to the counter which I just noticed had my breakfast displayed on it, picked up the dishes, and smashed them on the ground. I stared in shock.

"Clean this up now, and get up to your room. I don't want to see your face all day," she said. I couldn't move. It's like my eyes were glued to the froot loops and muffin bits soaked on the floor mixed with pieces of broken glass. "Why are you just standing there? I said clean this up now!" she reached out for me but I ran to the dust closet to get the mop and broom. She didn't follow me.

"I'm sorry mom," I said.

"Jesus Logan, you don't get it do you? Stop talking. Clean this shit up. Now. Do you get it?" she said.

"Yes ma'am," I said picking up the pieces of glass and putting them in a pile. I guess I wasn't cleaning fast enough because my mom kicked me in the side, making me fall in the spilled milk. I covered my face just in case she kept going. After about five seconds I peeked through my fingers to check if she was still there. She was, and she was still looking at me the same. And my father had gone back to his chair.

"Logan, just clean it up will you? Stop messing around," I heard my father say. I looked at him but then looked away. Once again he had taken her side.

"I'm going upstairs to put my makeup on. Logan, when I'm done you better be in that room of yours," she said heading for the stairs. She purposely stepped on my right foot too, but I apologized for that anyway. Quickly I mopped up the spilled milk and swept up the cereal and muffin bits and dumped them in the trash.

"Loges, I'm running to the market. If your mother asks, that's where I am," he said to me. He just got up and left. Like none of this even happened. Sometimes I wish my father wasn't so afraid of my mom. I followed him to the door and watched it close in front of me. I watched him get into his car and drive away. I walked up the stairs miserably and went into my room. I went to my desk and looked out the window. I wonder what Saturday mornings are like at Kendall's house. I heard my mother come out of the bathroom and walk towards my room. The familiar click around my doorknob was there too. Padlocked. This happened when both of my parents are gone at the same time. It's like they don't trust me or something. They think I'm gonna run out and tell the world that my parents hurt me. Well I tell you, that's the last thing I would do. If I did that, they'd take me away from my family. They'd take me away from the boy across the street.

Hours pass by as I sit on my bed, feeling my stomach growl occasionally. I really wish my dad wasn't so confusing. One minute he's kissing my nose, the next minute he's telling me to clean up the mess my mother made. I hear a knock on my door. I just look at it not knowing what else to do. I can't really open it. The knocking continues. I decide to hide in my closet. Maybe if I don't answer she'll just go away. I still hear knocking followed by a click. The lock must have been removed. My heart is beating in my throat and I feel as if I could die right here, right now. My door squeaks open. Light footsteps pace around my room and then disappear. I breathed a heavy sigh of relief. Shortly after, the footsteps return.

"Logan?" a voice whispered. It's Kendall. How did he get in my house? I can't let him find me. Then he'll know everything. I crack the closet door open a bit so I can see. He's sitting on my desk chair facing the door leading out into the hall. He looks so cute. There's something about that hat he's wearing that makes me smile. When he looks my way, I shut the door quickly, and obviously. "Logan? Are you in there?" His tone is soft and welcoming. I cracked the door again. "It's me Kendall." I open the door all the way and see him kneeling by the closet. His expression grows alarmed when he sees my eyes. I tried to hide my face with my hands.

"Please don't look at me," I said.

"Why are you hiding in the closet?" he asked me.

"I'm not hiding," I said evasively.

"Then what are you doing?" He asked.

"I-uh, how did you get in here?" I asked, avoiding his question.

"I came home and saw someone left your front door open. I came over to close it, but I thought I'd come in and see if you wanna come by and play some hockey with me and the guys.

"I can't," I said.

"Logan, your door had a lock on it," he said.

"Yeah, I know," I said looking down.

"Why was it locked?" he asked. I start to feel my ears get hot again, except this time it was because I didn't know what to say. "I saw some things downstairs that looked like they were thrown. I picked them up for you if you don't mind."

"What things?" I asked.

"Just a few picture frames," he said. "And I pushed in a couple of chairs too." I just nodded my head. "Logan, are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm great," I said smiling. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"Well, there was quite a mess downstairs, your door was locked, and you were hiding in your closet," he said. I just kept smiling.

"Are we friends Kendall?" I asked.

"Sure, I'd like to think we are," he said. I swallowed my heart.

"Really? Like a real friend who does stuff with me and goes places with me and won't mind being seen in public with me?" I blurted out. Kendall's face softens.

"Yeah," he said putting his hand on my shoulder. "And Logan, I know how to keep a secret." I looked down at his touch and almost melted. I tried to picture it in my head. Actually having a friend who I can talk to and maybe confide in. My thoughts are cut short due to the front door being slammed. I jumped up immediately and began panicking.

"You have to leave now," I said.

"Why? Are you not allowed to have friends over?" he asked.

"No, no. You just gotta get out, now," I said.

"Logan I don't see what the big deal is. You can just say I saw your door open and you said I could come in," he reasoned.

"No! No I can't do that!" I said. My voice was rising and I think he could tell I was beginning to tremble. I heard the footsteps coming up the stairs.

"You gotta hide Kendall," I said pushing him back in the closet. I closed the closet door behind him and sat at my desk pretending to be working on something.

"Who unlocked this door?" my mother's sharp voice cuts through me like my razor blade. I heard the closet door peak open.

"Stay in there," I whispered. The door closed.

"Logan?" my mother came in my room and I spun around in my chair.

"Yes mom?" I replied.

"Did you leave this room?" she asked.

"No ma'am," I said.

"Well, your door was unlocked. Has your father been home?" she asked.

"I'm not sure, mom. I've been in here the whole time I promise," I said. She walked around my room a bit. Next thing I know she shoved me off my chair and I flied off of it, hitting my head on my dresser. She grabbed the collar of my shirt.

"The next time you leave this room without telling me, and the next time you lie about it I won't be so nice to you," She threatened. She released her grip on me, but stayed in my room.

"I'm sorry mom. I won't lie," I said.

"Damn right you won't lie. You won't be making me look bad," she came back at me with her fist connecting with my jaw. I just sat there fearing that she would open the closet door.

"Umm, excuse me?" My head turned ninety degrees to the closet door and saw that Kendall had come out. My mother's face turned a scary shade of red. One I never want to see again.

"Who is this?" she asked me.

"I'm Kendall. Nice to meet you," he stuck out his hand to shake which my mother ignored.

"Dad said earlier that he could come over," I pointed out.

"I don't care what dad said," mom said. "Did I say you can have friends over?"

"No ma'am," I said.

"I came in myself. I saw your front door was open and I came over to shut it for you. But then I thought I'd see if Logan can come out," he said. My mother's face turned redder, if possible.

"You let yourself in?" she asked him.

"Yes. I'm sorry," he said realizing her demeanor wasn't changing.

"Logan, show your friend to the door and come back to your room alone please," my mother said. Her tone was calmer, and she took my seat on the chair. I got up and lead Kendall downstairs.

"I'm sorry if my mother scared you," I said avoiding eye contact.

"It's okay, I wasn't scared. I was worried for you," he said. I didn't bother replying. Kendall knows everything now so there's no point in trying to defend her or something.

"Please don't tell anyone Kendall," I begged when I opened the front door. He looked at me for a moment.

"Logan, how you're living isn't normal. You have to tell someone if you feel you're in danger," he said.

"I'm not in danger. My parents do love me, they just are embarrassed to show it I guess," I said.

"If they really loved you Logan, they wouldn't be putting you through this," he said.

"Please, please don't tell anyone," I repeated.

"Logan, if I can't tell anyone, then I don't want to be a part of anything going on there," he said. His face was one of pure disgust.

"But Kendall, you said we were friends," I said sadly.

"We are friends. And friends help friends. If you were my friend, you'd let me help you," he said.

"If you were my friend, you wouldn't pressure me," I said.

"Logan, I understand you're scared and upset. But I really am trying to help you, but if you really don't want me to say anything, I won't."

"Kendall, thank you, thank you," I go to hug him and he accepts. His hug is warm and loving, and I can tell he means it.

"Please think about it though. Think of getting some help," he turned, looked both ways before crossing and entered his house. Even now I still don't know if we're friends.

When I returned to my room my mother had her second helping. In other words, she laid it on me really hard. I tried to hold in my screams and cries but it was one of those ones where she didn't stop until she felt she had done enough. I think I might have broken ribs but I can never bring that up to her. It would only make her madder. And it would make me look weak.

I haven't eaten a thing today and it's catching up to me. I'm not allowed to have dinner tonight either so it looks like I'll be having those nightmares again. And to think I woke up in a good mood.

**Good? Bad? Review? :)**


	5. A Sunday Worth Repeating

**A/N: Thanks for the 2 guest reviews. I love them just as much as all the other ones :) Enjoy some fluff!**

**Disclaimer: Don't own the BTR dudes**

The grumbling of my stomach wakes me from my nightmares early in the morning. I checked the clock on my desk. 2:55am. My vision is blurry and I stumble as I make my way over to turn on my desk lamp.

"I need to eat something," I said to myself. Quietly, I opened my bedroom door. The hall was dark and I squinted my eyes to find the stairs. There's a light coming from the bottom and that gets me worried. Someone's gotta be down there. I tried to turn around but my balance is off and I tumble down the stairs, landing on the hard floor below with a loud clamor. I stayed on the floor, not wanting to make any more noises, and I awaited my mother's presence of scolding for leaving my room before the sun came up. But no one comes. No one is down here. Someone left the TV on. My ribs hurt terribly. My whole body aches actually. But mostly my ribs. I wrap my arms loosely around my body. I long for the muffins in the basket on the counter. They're taunting me. They know I can't stand up and grab them and rip them out of the package and eat them. They know they're more powerful than me. They know it. Minutes passed by and those minutes turned into hours. Soon, I am asleep on the floor right by the stairs where I fell, with my arms still wrapped around my torso.

_Loud claps of thunder cry out in the background. Darkness surrounds me as I try desperately to find the way out. I'm suffocating. It's like the invisible barriers are closing in on me. On one end of the long hallway is my mother. Uncaring and arms folded across her chest. Dark thunder clouds surround her. On the other end is Kendall. The boy across the street. He smiles warmly, and holds his hand out to me. Only, when I reach for it, the farther he seems to be. I'm staggering, running after him and the rain seems to fall harder on me. My mother screams my name. I'm tripping over nothing, probably my own feet and the rain is burning my eyes. I turn around to see what my mother wants. There's a dish by her feet; broken. I find myself running, faster and faster towards Kendall only for each step I take forward, he takes backward. For every step I take forward, my mother takes double. She's closing in on me. I'm just about to feel his touch, to grab his hand and feel his fingers in between my own when my mother jumps on me, taking me down, falling into a deep, dark abyss._

"Logan, Logan," my dad whispered. I rolled over and squinted my eyes, stretching and hurting my ribs in the process. "What are you doing on the floor buddy?" he rubbed my back soothingly. This is the side of my father that I wish would last forever. I didn't answer him. I just let this moment last and soaked up the warmth of my father's temporary love. He picked me up and carried me over to the sofa where he tucked me in with a throw he found in the blanket closet. A faint light comes in through the window. I tried to glance at the clock in the kitchen to see what time it was but I'm so groggily I can't see straight. "Your mother left early for the gym, said she'd be there all day," he added.

"All day?" I repeated.

"All day," he confirmed. He sat by my feet and smiled at me.

"So, does that mean you'll be gone too?" I asked.

"Nope, I don't have any plans today. I cancelled working with Bob because your mother said she wanted to do something together today," he said. I shuddered. My mom's idea of doing something together usually ends up with me needing multiple stitches. "But now she's with her trainer for the day."

"So, what are you gonna do?" I asked him.

"What do ya wanna do?" he asked me.

"Wait, you want to do something with me?" I asked confused.

"Yeah," he said smiling. "So what do you have in mind?" I smiled at the thought of being able to choose what happens today.

"I can pick anything?" I asked, just to be sure.

"Well, nothing that's extraordinary, but sure," he replied. I stopped to think for a moment. What is something I always wanted to do with my dad but never was able to?

"Can we just sit here today and watch TV together?" I asked. I was quiet, resembling a kid who just asked if he can have dessert before dinner, and I unintentionally made puppy-dog eyes. My dad looked at me sympathetically and smiled softly.

"If that's what you wanna do bud," he said. "It's still a little early though; there might not be anything on right now."

"I don't care dad," I said. "I want to do it anyway."

"Why don't I cook you some breakfast first? You look like you could use a good wake-me-up," he said. I rubbed my receded belly in agreeance and nodded my head for extra emphasis. I loved this. My father is cooking me breakfast, he's gonna watch TV with me, and even in the same room as me! The last time we watched TV together, I had to sit in the kitchen at the counter and I couldn't talk. It was after 7pm. Still, I enjoyed every minute of it.

It seems my thoughts have staggered on yet again because before I know it, my breakfast is ready.

"French toast?" I asked a little too excited.

"Eat up," he said cheerfully. He hands me a plate of french toast and pulls over a dinner tray and places a cup of milk on it.

"I get to eat in here too?" I asked.

"Yep," he said, taking his seat in his chair. I just look at my food. I try to hold onto this moment forever. I will never know when this is gonna happen again. "Better eat it before it gets cold." I have no problem obeying these rules. I eat every last bite. I even lick the syrup off of the plate. I finish my milk in one large gulp. My father took my dishes when I finished and he even wiped up the ring around my glass of milk.

We watched TV and hung out all day. He was right, nothing was on. But I still enjoyed every minute of it. We laughed at random infomercials and cheered on the local soccer team. For lunch, he made us both sandwiches with curly fries and a tall glass of lemonade with a fruit salad as well. After lunch when we decided TV got boring we went outside in the front yard and threw the football. It was great. I found out a lot of stuff about my dad. Like, how mom scares him just as much as me, and how he always wanted to do cool stuff with me but thought I'd think he's lame. He even bought me an ice cream from the ice cream truck. I had such a good time. I even saw Kendall leave his house and he waved and smiled to me, and gave me a thumbs up. Yes, of course my heart melted when he did that.

We went inside just as the sun was starting to set. I was exhausted but energized at the same time. My father ordered a pizza for dinner and we ate and watched some show about this guy eating bugs that were covered in maple syrup.

"I'm gonna go wash up," I said. My dad smiled at me, so I took that as my permission to leave the room. As I scrubbed today's germs off of my hands I looked up in the mirror and for the first time in forever, found happiness. "Hey you," I said smiling to my reflection. "Glad you're back."

When I returned to the living room my father had pulled the mattress out of the sleeper-sofa. He made it look all comfortable too.

"Do I get to sleep in here tonight too?" I asked. He nodded. I couldn't believe today happened. I laid down and got comfortable while my dad did the same. I flipped through the channels and settled on one that was showing a movie about a princess and a frog. That's when my mother came in. She walked in and stopped in the kitchen, watching my dad and me lying on the bed, watching a movie. I guess she's had a busy day because she doesn't bother accusing us of doing something random, and just goes in her bedroom.

"I love you," my dad whispered. I look up at him in shock. When I glance at the clock in the kitchen it shows 10:18pm. He really means it.

"I love you too," I said, not hiding the tears in my eyes. He sat closer to me and I snuggled into his chest for the first time in about eight years, and for the first time in about eight years he snuggled back.

**I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. Can't have Loges getting hurt all the time! Review?**


	6. Kendall's Secret

**A/N: Hope you all noticed the summary change. Just wanted to give you guys an actual idea of the plot of this story. Thank you to the 2 guest reviewers! You know how I feel about you ;) This chapter is rated more M for language and sexual references.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own the BTR guys**

My morning was all right today. Besides my mother shoving me through the front door because I dropped my waffles on the living room carpet, it was kind of a peaceful morning. I had to walk to school though. My dad is scheduled to work mornings for the rest of the week. I was too scared to ask Kendall for a ride too, and plus it was a nice morning so I didn't mind the walk. It was really nice actually. It gave me time to just think. I loved spending time with my dad yesterday. It was probably the best day of my life. I hope we're able to do that more often. My mind dazes and I think of all the nice things my dad told me yesterday, and how he said he loved me way past 7pm.

"Logan, are you paying attention?" Mr. Lang asked me.

"Yes sir," I replied.

"Well, would you mind answering my question then?" he asked. I stammered, thinking of what to say, but Mr. Lang caught on to my absentmindedness. "Instead of gazing out the window, try taking some of this information in. You could use some of it." It hurt me when Mr. Lang was strict with me. I always thought of him as my friend rather than my instructor.

"I'm sorry sir," I said. I looked over my notes and saw that I was in fact falling behind. We were discussing some story about a woman who pretended to be a man to get some guy to like her. Weird book.

"Excuse me Mr. Lang," someone said while opening the door. "Note for one of your students." It was Kendall. He had office period right now. I knew that because I see him enter the main office every day at the same exact time. He does random duties for the secretaries. He looks so cute standing there waiting for Mr. Lang to turn around from the chalkboard.

"Hey Kendall," said a girl in the front row. She was all smiles and flirty.

"Hey," he replied with a wink.

"Ahhh Kendall. Here to take away more of my students?" Mr. Lang said taking the note.

"Sorry," Kendall said. "Principal Morgan needs to see someone."

"I see," Mr. Lang said. "Melissa, you're wanted in the principal's office." The girl in the front row grabbed her things and left with Kendall. I tried to wave but I don't think he saw me. When the door closed the class erupted with laughter. I looked around to see what I had missed.

"Mel is needed in the principal's office," one girl mimicked. She put air quotes around principal's office. The class continued to laugh.

"I don't get it," I whispered to Blenny, the one kid in class weirder than me. That was mean. I take it back, kind of.

"Dude, Melissa isn't going to the principal," he whispered back. His breath smelled of onions and stale barbequed potato chips.

"What do you mean? Where is she going?" I asked, still confused.

"She's going to have some fun with Kendall," he said. My face must have still had the same look of confusion because he added more bluntly, "They're going to have sex." My heart that was swelling at Kendall's beauty sunk to my feet like a cinderblock.

"How do you know for sure?" I asked, my voice shaking.

"Because my brother told me. He brags about it to everyone on the hockey team," Blenny said. His brother was on the hockey team too. I guess he would know. "The dude's a player man, he'll do anyone." My heart shatters at the sound of his words. It can't be true. I refuse to believe it until I know for a fact. Still….he did seem pretty happy to see her.

"Well, I bet he's happy with Melissa," I said. Melissa. Good to know.

(Later)

I grab my lunch tray and make my way across the buffet table. Today I chose a turkey sandwich, with carrot sticks and grapes. And milk of course. I headed to the gym locker room and sat down on the floor, ignoring the looks given to me by the students changing. And I took my time eating my lunch. I couldn't stop thinking of Kendall. Could that really be true about him? I didn't get that vibe. Still, it kind of hurts my heart to picture it.

"There you are," My thoughts of Kendall were interrupted by the actual Kendall, entering the locker room.

"Here I am," I say softly.

"Do you eat lunch in here every day?" he asked me.

"Yep," I said. "It's less awkward." Kendall looked around the locker room and saw everyone changing.

"I highly doubt eating in front of naked people is less awkward than just sitting in the cafe," he said laughing. I just looked at him and faked a smile.

"It's a lot harder to find a seat when no one wants you to sit with them," I said. Kendall's heart-stopping smile went away.

"You can always sit with me and my friends Logan," he said. "That's actually why I followed you into the gym. I wanted to introduce you to everyone."

"Really?" I asked. "I don't know. Do you think they'll like me?"

"Sure, c'mon," he said offering me his hand. I took his hand and felt the softness of his skin. You'd think someone who spends his entire time playing hockey would have rough, calloused hands. His felt like silk. I grabbed my tray and followed him back into the cafeteria and over to the back where his table was. Kendall sat down at the table. He kissed Melissa and smiled and I felt my heart drop again but I tried to hide it. "Hey guys, this is Logan." I just sort of stood there awkwardly, awaiting the call for the janitor to come mop up everyone's puke.

"Hi Logan," everyone said in unison. They all sounded sweet, but it sounded rehearsed. Still, I'll take what I can get.

"Hi everyone," I said softly. I placed my tray on the table and sat down. Kendall went around the table and introduced me to his friends.

"Logan, this is Carlos, that's James, Erica, Gomez, Noah, Kelsey, Melissa, and Kendall," Kendall said going around the table chuckling as he ended on himself. I half-smiled awkwardly and everyone smiled back. At least they're welcoming.

(Later)

The sun is burning hot and I dread the walk home. On a normal day, I wouldn't mind so much but today is just different. I was in a bad mood once I saw how flirty and cute Kendall and Melissa are together. I didn't want to show it though. I don't want to hurt our friendship, or whatever it is we have.

"Oh crap," I said. I was just at the end of the parking lot when I realized I forgot my English book in my locker. Mr. Lang will be so angry if I flunk tomorrow's test. I turned around and ran back into the school. It's amazing how empty and quiet this place is after everyone is gone. I got to my locker and noticed my book is missing. "Crap again." I tried to think of the places I brought my book. I decide to check the cafeteria and the gym locker room, in that order. Unfortunately to my luck, it was not in either place. "Where can that stupid book be?" I asked under my breath. I looked over my shoulder to make sure my mother didn't hear me say the word stupid. You never know where she'll pop up. As I made my way back to the front doors of the school, something tells me to check Mr. Lang's class. So that's where my legs brought me. I'm just about to enter the class when I hear laughter. I could recognize that laugh anywhere. It's Kendall. He's whispering to someone. A girl. It sounds like Melissa. What are they doing in there? I'm afraid to look in the little window on the closed door. I'm scared of what I'll see. Maybe Melissa all over Kendall? Good thing I didn't have to look, because the door opened shortly after.

"That was fun," Kendall's voice said.

"Definitely. See it wasn't so bad. Same time tomorrow?" Melissa asked Kendall, exiting the room.

"I'll be here waiting," Kendall's voice said. Melissa closed the door behind her and left Kendall in the room.

"Oh, Logan," Melissa said, shocked to see me behind the door.

"Hi," I said.

"You didn't see what went on in there did you?" she asked worriedly. I wanted badly to say I did, but I'm afraid of my mother overhearing me lie somehow.

"No, I didn't," I said. She sighed and smiled.

"Okay, well, see you!" she hurried off and left through the double doors. I took a deep breath and turned the door handle to the classroom. Kendall was just sitting there, facing the window. I cleared my throat which caught his attention.

"Oh, Logan, you scared me," he said, turning. Around him was all this stuff I was assuming was his hockey gear.

"Hey, I just saw Melissa leave from in here," I said hoping he would fill the rest in.

"Oh," he said. His face looked a little worried but he just took out his phone and started poking around on it.

"I just came in here to look for my English book," I said. He ignored me and kept looking at his phone. I stood there for a second just waiting. "Okay, bye," I said. I looked around Mr. Lang's desk and found my book in one of his drawers. I took it and headed for the door.

"Hey Logan," Kendall said as I was about halfway out the door.

"Yeah Kendall?" I asked. He paused for a bit. "What is it?" I asked.

"It's just…can you keep a secret?" he asked me.

"Of course I can," I said coming back in the classroom. I sat down in a chair next to him.

"I just feel like I can trust you," he said. I felt flattered, and I almost cried.

"Of course you can trust me Kendall. I can keep a secret just like you," I said. Another long pause occurred before Kendall spoke up.

"I'm not dating Melissa," he said to me. I just sat there wide eyed.

"But, you guys really act like you are," I pointed out.

"I know that. The truth is, I'm failing almost all of my classes, and Melissa is tutoring me and helping me study," he said. I was shocked. Completely relieved to the point where I could hear the Hallelujah Choir play in my head, but shocked.

"But Kendall, you seem so knowledgeable," I said.

"Yeah, no. I'm really not. My highest grade is a C+," he admitted. I almost felt bad for him. He looked so ashamed. I thought of what my parents would do to me if I ever received grades like that.

"Is that why you act like you're dating her?" I asked.

"Yes! Logan, nobody can find out about this!" he said. You can hear the pleading in his voice. "If coach finds out about my grades he'll kick me off the team. Please don't tell anybody Logan!"

"I won't, I promise," I said.

"You gotta swear Logan. Swear to me," he begged.

"I swear Kendall. I won't tell a soul," I offered my hand to him which he shook lightly. There's that silky feeling again.

"Thank you Logan," he said.

"It's the least I can do Kendall. You've done so much for me and I barely even know you," I said. He smiled. I smiled.

"Can you keep another secret Logan?" he asked. I nodded my head yes.

"I'm totally not into Melissa that way," he said. My heart regained its place in the center of my chest.

"Really?" I asked, a little too happily.

"Yeah. Actually," he looked around to see if anyone was nearby. "I don't like any girls." It's like I was floating on a cloud. What did he just tell me? He doesn't like girls?

"Well, that's okay Kendall, not everybody does," I said.

"It's not okay in this town Logan. You're new here. Homosexuality isn't allowed. I'd be a laughing stock. I'd be shunned by my own family and friends." He puts his head in his hands and sobs. I almost want to cry too. I know what he means. That's the same reason I won't come out. If my parents ever found out, they would probably actually kill me.

"Kendall, it's okay," I said. I put my hand on his back. He kept sobbing. Eventually he lifted his head and looked at me. I smiled. He wiped his nose and eyes.

"Logan, please don't repeat it," he pleaded.

"I would never do that, Kendall," I said. He seemed to relax a bit and he stopped sobbing.

"I'm sorry," he said. I just looked at him.

"For what?" I asked eventually.

"For all of this. You shouldn't have to deal with my problems. You have problems of your own." He said.

"Your problems are more important," I said. He smiled that perfect, golden, heart-stopping smile.

"Want a ride home?" he asked me. "I'm gonna tell my mother I'm too sick for practice."

"If it's not too much trouble," I said.

"You live across the street. It's not trouble at all." He called his mother and we waited for her to come pick us up. Kendall was silent on the way home. I think he even fell asleep. I know how that feels. Too stressed you just have to sleep it off. And it didn't even hit me until I got up to my room after my mother gave me her afternoon beating, that I actually have a chance with the boy across the street.


	7. I Need Help

**A/N: Didn't get as many reviews on the last chapter. Not sure what went wrong there. Hope you enjoy this one! **

***Warning* This chapter contains more contents of domestic abuse that some of you may find uncomfortable or triggering.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own the BTR dudes**

I tried to process everything that happened today. Did Kendall really trust me enough to keep his secrets? I mean, those were pretty big secrets. And we did only just meet a few days ago. I looked out of the window by my desk and stared at his house, trying to answer these questions.

"I guess he just really likes me," I said under my breath. I couldn't hide the creeper smile that slowly crept its way onto my face either. I closed the window because it was getting cold. We're supposed to be getting a tropical storm soon and it always seems to get chilly whenever we have one of those.

"Logan," my dad said poking his head through my door. "Your mother wants you." I swallowed hard and headed downstairs.

"Where is she?" I asked my father once I got into the kitchen.

"In her room," he replied. Her room? I don't remember the last time I was in there. Yes I do actually. It was a few summers ago. It was insanely hot outside and I had to walk home from the grocery store which is like 3 miles away. By the time I got home I had severe heat exhaustion and almost died. My dad fled the town and just left me lying in the road in front of the house where I collapsed. When I woke up, I was in my mother's bed in the AC; it was the only room in the house that had air conditioning. My mother had put me there. She placed a cool hand towel on my forehead every few hours and refilled my glass of water constantly. She made me soup and even let me eat it in her bed. It was a really weird few days. It was the only time _she_ had done something nice to me instead of my father. She was probably more afraid of getting caught but still, I'll never forget those few days. When my mother actually cared for me. "You better hurry it up Logan," he added. I wasn't sure what to expect as my legs made their way across the kitchen floor over to her room. I knocked softly on her door.

"Come in Logan," my mother's voice said. I hesitated a bit but opened her door slowly. "Close the door quickly! You're letting out the cool!" Her room was freezing. Even in this chilly weather, she didn't let up on keeping her room chilled.

"You wanted me mom?" I asked. I stood kind of awkwardly by the door, not knowing whether she wanted me near her or not.

"No, not at all Logan. I only sent your father up to get you and have you come into my room just for the hell of it," she said. I hated when she used sarcasm on me. It made me feel so dumb and worthless.

"I'm sorry," I said. I stopped after that not wanting to get yelled at for talking too much again.

"You better be." I just stood there waiting for her to continue. "I got a call from your principal today Logan." I started to panic. Why would the principal call my mother? What did I do recently that would get me in trouble? Nothing comes to mind and I start to sweat uncontrollably. "He asked me about your nose and eyes." I touched my face forgetting about my wounds. The swelling and color has gone down around my eyes, but it's still noticeable.

"What did he say?" I asked, stuttering.

"He asked if you were involved in some type of fight and found it unusual that he would have to ask something like that about you, one of his 'most well-behaved students'," she quoted.

"And you said?" I asked quietly.

I told him you were accidently elbowed by your father," she said. I can't believe she involved my dad in this. It has absolutely nothing to do with him.

"And what did he say?" I asked.

"He told me to tell you to take it easy and to ice your face more," she said.

"And that was it?" I asked. "He didn't say anything else?"

"Nope, just that," she said. I was a bit relieved. I thought my dad was going to get in some sort of trouble.

"So…everything is fine then?" I half asked-half questioned.

"Oh of course not," she said. Sarcasm again? I don't think so.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Well I had to lie to your principal for you," she said.

"I'm not sure why though," I challenged. "You could have just told him I got in a fight at school. That is what really happened."

"Excuse me?" she said. Even though I wanted so bad to prove my point, it would only end in my pain.

"Nothing, never mind," I said. She smiled and nodded her head.

"Regardless," she said, walking toward her closet, "you know what a phone call home gets you." My eyes widen in fear.

"No, please," I begged.

"I'm sorry Logan, I really am. But you know the rules. I can't just let you get away with it," she said. She opened her door revealing the cuffs that were all too familiar to me.

"Mom, please. I'm sorry," I pleaded. I don't even know what I was sorry for. I just knew what was about to happen.

"I don't care if you're sorry. Get over here," she said sternly. I wanted to run away. Run away from everything. Just me and my dad. And Kendall. And chocolate pie. But my legs dragged my body over to her closet. I kneeled down in her closet facing the wall.

"Raise your arms," she said. I sobbed as my arms slowly made their way over my head. I felt the cool metal click around my wrists.

"Don't move," my mother said to me. "You'll only make it worse." I heard her rummaging around and hoped for a pang of guilt to hit her. But that would be giving her way too much credit.

"Mom. Please. I'm so sorry. Please don't hurt me," I begged. The rummaging stopped and for a half a second I almost think she is gonna let me go when I feel the whack on my bum. I screamed out in pain and tried to free myself from the cuffs but I couldn't. This is a game my mother likes to call "Indoor Cricket." Another whack. I tried to time her hits, so that on impact, I can breathe out of my mouth really fast to distract me. It doesn't work. Another whack. I tried to think of Kendall and how we're friends and could possibly be more than friends. It doesn't work. Another whack. I heard my father crack open a can of soda in the kitchen. I know he can hear my screams and my mother's laughter and yet he does nothing. Another whack. I pull at my wrists trying to break free of the cuffs but I only draw blood in the process.

"You better not make a mess in there or you'll be cleaning that up too," my mother said. Oh lovely. She's gifted me with the wonderful sound of her voice during this session. Hey! - Sarcasm sounds good on my end. Another whack. I am caught off guard and am hit in the head with the willow wood in her hand. I bite my tongue hard. I don't try to fight it anymore. I just let her do what she wants with me. I lose count with how many times I am hit after about fifteen. Now I just squeezed my eyes closed and prayed it would all end soon. About ten minutes after I stopped counting she released the cuffs from my very sore wrists and I didn't wait to be dismissed this time. I ran right out of her closet, right past my father sitting on his chair and out the door. I didn't even look both ways before crossing the street. I felt her coming after me. I bang on the door a few times and ring the bell once. Decades seemed to pass before, Kendall finally opened his door.

"Logan, what's up?" Kendall asked with a smile. His face almost immediately changed when he noticed my wrists. "What happened? Who did this to you?" As if he didn't already know the answer. I just cried. I cried and I cried and I felt lightheaded.

"I need help Kendall," I said in between breaths. He wrapped me in a tight hug and I had no intention of breaking it anytime soon.

"Okay," he whispered. He walked me into his home and as I was closing the door behind me I caught a glimpse of the look on my mother's face as she was standing in our front yard. That face will be in my nightmares tonight, if I even live that long.

**I hope I hear from more of you this time :) I really do love each and every reviewer I have. The last chapter of "Don't Forget About Me" is coming up later this week.**


	8. You're Always Safe with Me

**A/N: All of the reviews made me so happy! The guest ones as well, obviously. Love you guys just as much! I got a lot of PMs from people worrying about Logan and I just want to say, don't worry! I would never kill him off in this story. That would be just too mean. And I don't think my heart could take it. So, don't worry about him. I promise! :)**

**Disclaimer: Don't own the BTR dudes**

Kendall sat me on his couch so I could regain my breath. He sat next to me and watched over me; I don't think he took his eyes off of me at all to be exact.

"It'll be okay," he said. I looked him in the eyes. They were deeply filled with worry and distress. He was genuinely concerned about me. "You don't have to worry Logan. You won't be going back there any time soon. You're completely safe here."

"I know," I said. But I really didn't know. I'm so scared. I don't want my mother to hurt Kendall or his family. But I also don't want Kendall to worry himself sick over me. It's just a horrible pickle of a situation altogether.

"I'm gonna call my mother okay? She's not here right now. She's grocery shopping with everyone," Kendall said. "Just chill here for a minute and try to calm down. I'll be right in the other room." Kendall's house was nice. It had a homey feel to it. And it was cool inside. I got up and looked around his living room. There were family pictures in frames positioned on top of the fireplace. Kendall has a big family. It looks like he's the oldest. There are many small children, Mrs. Knight and a male whom I'm assuming is Mr. Knight, and then him. Such a happy family. I wonder what that's like. I walked over to the entryway of the kitchen; where Kendall left to make his phone call, and overheard some of the conversation:

"Yeah, mom he's just really upset right now. Can he just stay the night here? I don't want him going back to that place. It's not fair to him to have to live like that. I just want him to be safe. Okay." It sounded like the conversation was ending and I didn't want Kendall to think I was eavesdropping, even though I totally was. I went back over to the couch and peaked out the window through the blinds. My mother must have gone back inside. My house looks weird from this angle. I've never left home before except to go to school or the store. The sun was setting behind my house and left it in a creepy orange-purple glow.

"My mother said you can spend the night here. She'll be home pretty much any minute, they were on their way home with the groceries when I called," Kendall said reentering the living room.

"Okay," I said. "I'm not sure how my parents would like that though."

"It doesn't matter," he said. "You're not going back there."

"But, all my stuff is in my room," I said.

"We'll deal with that later okay," he said. "I just want you to relax and feel comfortable."

"Okay," I said. I couldn't help but wonder what my parents were doing at the moment though. Probably calling the police on me for leaving the house.

Not even twenty seconds after Kendall got off the phone, Mrs. Knight and the rest of the family arrived home with the groceries. Three small children raced each other inside laughing and screaming, followed by a tall man telling them to slow down and grab some bags. Mrs. Knight came up last.

"Kendall, go get some stuff," the man said walking straight into the kitchen. Kendall immediately complied and headed outside. I went to follow him but Mrs. Knight stopped me.

"One minute hun," she said to me. I waited by the door as she went into the kitchen to drop off some groceries. Kendall came in from outside and gave me a smile as he passed by me. I followed him into the kitchen anyway. This whole situation was making me feel awkward. I just wanted to do something. And standing halfway through the living room and kitchen entryway wasn't helping me.

"Logan, come with me." Mrs. Knight had me follow her back into the living room after she put a few boxes of something into her cabinets. I started to get worried again. Is she gonna yell at me for disobeying my parents and coming here? Is she gonna send me home? Is she gonna hurt me? I stood at the entryway of the kitchen and looked at her as she sat down on the couch. "It's okay, I just wanna talk with you hun." I went over and sat down at the end of the couch. She smiled softly. "Are you okay hun?" I fumbled with the drawstring on my pants and avoided making eye contact. Mrs. Knight placed her hand on my knee. "It's okay," she said softly. "You can tell me anything you want to." Even though I wasn't looking at her, I felt her eyes on me. It's that same pressure that Kendall put me through the night he came into my house and saw my mother push me off the chair. He wanted me to get help right there and then, but I was afraid. As I am now.

"Can we move away from the window? I'm afraid my mother will hear us talking." She was sweet and understanding, and smiled.

"Of course sweetie," she said. "Follow me." She led me up some stairs into another room. She turned on a lamp that was on a side table and sat down on a bed, Indian style. I'm assuming this is her room. "Just take your shoes off and climb on." I can tell she was just trying to ease my worry and make me feel comfortable but she was only making me more anxious. But I did what she requested. I took off my shoes and left them by her door, and sat on the end of her bed. She just smiled at me.

"I don't really know what to say," I said.

"You don't have to say anything you don't want to," she said. "I'm just here to help you sweetie." It's not that I don't want to say anything because I do, I just don't know if I should. I just don't want anyone to get hurt. Including myself.

"I guess I just don't really know where to begin," I said.

"Begin with tonight. What happened over there?" she asked. Was I really about to do this? I've been obeying the rules since I was a little kid. I haven't told anyone. Not even Kendall. He found out on his own. When I was younger, I was told that if I told anyone, I would get sent to jail. And they were only trying to protect me. Now I know it's because they would get sent to jail. They only were protecting themselves. I sighed heavily and decided it was time to start thinking of myself instead of my parents who claimed they cared about me. And Mrs. Knight and Kendall do care about me.

"My mother did something terrible to me," I said softly.

"What did she do sweetie?" she asked.

"Well, it was my fault," I said.

"What did she do?" she asked again.

"She hit me with a cricket bat," I said.

"Does she do this a lot?" she asked me.

"Well, sort of," I said.

"Sort of," she repeated.

"Yeah well it's different every time," I said.

"Every time what?" she asked.

"Every time I do something bad," I replied.

"Do you do bad things often?" she questioned.

"Yeah, but I try not to," I said.

"What kinds of bad things do you do?" she asked. I shifted uncomfortably and she picked up on this.

"I ask too many questions, I leave crumbs on the counter, I sometimes forget to wipe up drinks that spill out of my cup, I'll track mud into the house, I stay up past my bedtime to study, I don't do things fast enough, and I'm just a horrible person." I realized it really is my fault. Everything is. "It's no wonder my parents treat me the way they do."

"That is not your fault honey," she said. "Those are no excuses to do bad things to you. There are no excuses at all, to do bad things to you." I just looked at my hands. That familiar feeling of self-pity making its way back into my stomach. I want so bad to cut it all away. I reached into my pocket and felt my friend still wrapped in tissue, but I took my hand out empty. "Do you need bandages?" I looked at my hands and saw that the wounds on my wrists had caused my hands to get, well bloody.

"I think they're okay," I said. They're probably not, but I don't want to seem like I need a lot of help.

"So what caused you wrists to get like that?" she asked me. Paranoid, I looked towards her window, as if my parents could hear me from way up here.

"My mother had me handcuffed in her closet so I couldn't get away when she was hitting me," I said.

"Oh my word," she said. She seemed really shocked.

"But it was my fault," I said. "I caused it."

"How on Earth could you do something so terrible to deserve that kind of treatment by your own parents?" she asked.

"My principal called my house. He was wondering how I got these eyes and broken nose," I said. "It was my fault."

"So, because your principal called, worried about you, she took it out on you?" she questioned. I just shrugged.

"I don't know what else to say," I said.

"That's okay," she said. "You just have got to stop blaming yourself for this. You don't deserve an ounce of this abuse. You're an angel sweetie." I couldn't help but show my smile. I just couldn't hide it. I had actually gotten my first compliment. And it felt great. "And you've got to stop defending them."

"That's true," Kendall piped in when he entered the room. He lied down on his stomach on the bed, next to me. "None of this is your fault, so don't even think that anymore." There was silence for a while and I had tired myself from talking, so I just sat there and exchange looks with Mrs. Knight and Kendall.

"Well, why don't I start dinner then? Are you hungry Logan?" she asked. I patted my stomach in emphasis.

"Yes," I said. All three of us headed downstairs and I offered to help Mrs. Knight prepare the food, but she declined, saying I was a guest and she can handle it. It's like I was being treated like royalty. And I loved every minute of it.

(Later)

After we ate, we all sat in the living room and watched TV. All of us. All seven of us. In the same room. Watching the same TV. I enjoyed having everyone's company so much. They all treated me so nicely. I know it's probably because they pitied me but at least I can get that from them. My parents never cared for pity. Only if it was them.

I slept on Kendall's spare mattress in his room. It took me a while to fall asleep, but as I was drifting off, I remember hearing Kendall whisper:

"You're always safe with me."


	9. How My Mother Hurts Me

**A/N: Haven't posted in a long time! I've been so busy with home situations that I didn't really feel like updating. But I'm back. Also, for those waiting for the Don't Forget About Me finale, I'm sorry it hasn't been uploaded yet. I promise you it's coming soon.**

**Also, one more thing. I get a lot of reviews saying that they can't take the situation with Logan getting hurt. I'm sorry for that. But I can't really change the plot of this story. I understand it may be uncomfortable to read but I already have a lot of things planned. But to ease your minds I can tell you this: he isn't gonna die. So don't worry! :) Just know that no matter how bad things may get between him and his parents, you don't have to worry.**

**Disclaimer Don't own the BTR dudes, although I wish I owned Kogan.**

It wasn't long before I was awake again. I rolled over on my side and vaguely saw Kendall peering out of his bedroom door. He looks so cute standing there in his robe.

"What are you doing?" I asked him. I think I scared him because he was taken aback.

"I think there's someone here," he said. I got up out of the bed on the floor and went over to him slowly. I could hear a faint conversation going on downstairs but I couldn't make out who it was between or what they were saying.

"What time is it?" I whispered through my yawn.

"About 11:30," Kendall said in an equally hushed tone. After a moment of silence and yawns from the both of us I recognized my father's voice coming from downstairs.

"Oh no," I said. "That's my dad." I started to back up into Kendall's room. I ended up hitting a bookcase and made a lot of noise as some things fell off.

"Shh, calm down Logan, its okay. Just stay up here," he said. He turned to go downstairs and he shut the door behind him. As much as I wanted to stay secure up in Kendall's room, I got up and followed him to the top of the stairs. He was just standing there leaning over, listening.

"_No, no everything's fine. My wife and I just got into an argument and he got scared that's all. We'd like him to come home now,"_ my father's voice said.

"He's lying to them," I said barely audible. Kendall held up a finger to him mouth. I covered my mouth with my hand.

"_Could you just get him? It's really getting late," _my father's voice added. No! I don't want to go back home.

"I don't want to go back home Kendall," I whispered. Kendall started down the stairs and I followed behind him.

"No, stay up here. I don't want you near him," he said. He cares about me so much. My heart fluttered like when two butterflies are in love. I sat down and waited on the stairs. I tried listening to the conversation going on downstairs but all I could hear was my heartbeat in my ears. Eventually the beating stopped and I heard my name get called. Do I go down there? I went to turn to run back upstairs but Kendall stopped me.

"No, Logan it's okay. Come down," he said to me. I went down slowly and looked around awkwardly. My father was standing by the front door. I avoided eye contact.

"Everything okay, bud?" my father said to me. I just awkwardly folded my arms across my chest. I just hated this right now. I stood behind Mrs. Knight, just in case.

"We just woke up so he's probably a little out of it," Kendall said. I wasn't out of it and he knows that. He was covering for me not replying. Thank you.

"I told your father that we know everything and you won't be returning home," Mrs. Knight said. I understand that she's trying to help, but if I felt awkward before, this was magnified by ten thousand. I didn't say anything. How can my father just be okay with this? First he lies, then when he finds out the truth he's totally fine with it.

"I can calm her down for the night," my father said. He's talking about my mother. When she finds out that I broke my promise and told our family secret by telling Mrs. Knight what goes on in that house…I stop my thoughts from continuing. "You gonna be okay here?"

"Yeah," I said softly. I'm still hiding behind Mrs. Knight just in case he might try to grab me at the last minute.

"Okay well, I'll go get your things then," he said. He smiled at us and left.

"What a psycho," Kendall said. I just looked at him. "What kind of parent is just okay with giving their son away?" I frowned.

"It's because they don't like me anyway," I said. "They're probably glad to get rid of me."

"Oh honey, well we're more than overjoyed to have you here," Mrs. Knight said. She hugged me tight. My father returned a few moments later with some of my things. He brought back my backpack with my school work, a hoodie, swim trunks and half of a soggy sandwich from the pub down the street. At least he tried. Kinda.

(The Next Morning)

We woke up and had breakfast as a family this morning. It was great. And we drove to school as a family too. They're really trying their best to make me feel at home. And I really love it here. Kendall and I have to walk home today too but as long as I'm with him I know it'll be okay.

(Later)

The school day is just about to wrap up and I'm looking forward to the walk home with Kendall. It'll give us time to actually just get to know each other. I don't really know much about him. Except that he's really cute and he's bad at school. Kendall came into the class with a note.

"Oooh Melissa, look it's your man," some girls were giggling. I was giggling too, because I know what really goes on between them.

"Logan, you're wanted in the principal's office," Mr. Orville said. I had to do a double take.

"Me?" I asked.

"You," he said. I gulped hard and gathered my things.

"Why does the principal want me?" I asked Kendall as we were walking in the hallway.

"I'm not sure," he said. "But he said it's gonna take a while and I don't really wanna wait so I'm just gonna go straight home okay?" My heart kind of cried a bit but I don't want to make him upset.

"Okay," I said. I entered the principal's office and sat down in one of the waiting chairs.

"He can see you now, go right in," the secretary, Mrs. Cleary said to me. I got up and knocked on the principal's door.

"Come on in Logan," he said. I entered his office and sat down in a chair in front of his desk.

"How are you Logan?" he asked me.

"I'm well sir," I replied.

"Are you sure?" he asked me. I pondered for a bit.

"Yeah," I said.

"Because, I received a phone call from your mother," he continued. I felt the sweat start dripping down my neck. "She's worried about you. She said you didn't come home last night."

"Umm, I slept over a friend's house," I said. I'm a total wreck. I can feel my hands start to tremble.

"On a school night?" he asked me.

"Yeah, we were um, studying for a thing," I said.

"A thing?" he repeated.

"Yeah, I'm uh- tutoring him," I lied.

"Okay well, your mother wants you to go straight home. I'll be calling her to make sure you do." I felt my eyes widen. "Is that understood Logan? If not you will be punished by me." More than you think sir.

"I understand. I'll go straight home." I walked home miserably. What is my mother gonna do to me when I get home? I start to cry and I don't care who sees. Once I come to our street I walk really slowly.

"I don't know what to do," I said. I looked over at Kendall's house, and looked back at mine. It reminds me of my nightmares. Having to choose between the two of them. There are cop cars parked outside of my house. My legs immediately go across the street. I knock on the door and a worried Mrs. Knight opened the door. I notice the officers are inside. They must have known I would go to the opposite house.

"There you are honey, I was worried," Mrs. Knight said. She wrapped me in a hug.

"Am I in trouble?" I asked.

"No sweetie," she said. "I was just worried. Where is Kendall?"

"He left early," I said. Her eyes showed deep concern. "I had to stay after for a talk with the principal and he said he would just come straight home."

"Well he isn't here yet," one officer said.

"Kendall is missing?" I asked. The stunned silence of all three people in the room confirmed what I hoped would never ever come true.

"I'm gonna go looking around the neighborhood for him," I said.

"Good idea," Mrs. Knight said. I noticed my mother's car wasn't in the drive way so I wasn't too worried about being out alone. Where could Kendall be? I searched up and down the roads around Mrs. Knight's house. I didn't want to get too far away. Especially with the weather lately. We're supposed to be getting a tropical storm soon.

I decided to head back to Kendall's house. I had gotten no leads as to where he was and it was around the time my mother usually got home from work. I got on Mrs. Knight's steps just in time because my mother pulled into the driveway. She saw me too. I wasn't fast enough. Something told me to wait on the porch until she got out of her car. When she got out she didn't even look my way even though I know she sees me. Not even a glance when she went up and unlocked the door. But when she turned around to close the door behind her, she gave me a smile that made the hairs stick up on the back of my neck. That look can only mean one thing.

She knows what happened to Kendall.

**Good? Bad? Review?**

**I am so super sorry I haven't gotten around to updating Don't Forget About Me. I can tell you that it's in the works! I know exactly what I want to happen; I just have to make sure it all sounds coherent when I actually type it up.**

**Anyone planning on seeing Heffron Drive this tour? I will be at the September 5****th**** show! Maybe I'll see some of you there :)**

**Oh also, What happened to Kendall? :o Leave some guesses in a review!**


	10. What Happened to Kendall?

**A/N: Glad you enjoyed the last one. You all were pretty much correct with your guesses but only one person guessed the closest as to what happened to Kendall. The wait is no more! You'll all find out right now. And at the end of this chapter, enjoy the very first Point-of-View change!**

***Warning* May have triggering contents of abuse.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own the BTR guys.**

I swallowed my heart as I ran across the street. I didn't even bother knocking or taking off my shoes. I just barged right in.

"Where's Kendall?" I asked my mother. She nonchalantly sipped her coffee and avoided eye contact. "Where is he?" the raise of volume in my tone caused my mother to look at me sharply.

"Excuse me?" she said/questioned.

"You're not excused," I said. She took on a look of utter shock. "Where is Kendall, mom? I know you know where he is," I am shocked at how I'm treating my mother. I never would dare to talk to her this way. I couldn't even tell you what would happen to me if I did because it's never happened before. I always let her get away with it and I protect her. Not this time. She's gone too far. It's okay if she hurts me. But Kendall. No one hurts my Kendall.

"Logan, I haven't the slightest idea of what you're blabbering about. But since you're here now, go upstairs. I've got company coming over and you look disgusting. I will not have you embarrass me tonight," my mother told me. I didn't move. It's like the fire in my stomach wouldn't go away. No matter how much I would rather go upstairs and just hide from my mother's wrath, I couldn't. Not when Kendall's life is probably at stake.

"Not until you tell me what I want to know," I said.

"Logan, I'm not gonna tell you I want you upstairs again," my mother said.

"If I go upstairs, will you tell me what happened to Kendall?" I asked. She paused for a moment. Then she mumbled something I couldn't really hear.

"What?" I asked.

"You'll go upstairs because I told you to!" she yelled. She hit me hard across the face and I stumbled backwards. She just kept hitting me repeatedly. Her hand swung back like a pendulum and left a marking on my face, hit after hit. I crawled backwards towards the stairs and tried to shield my face as she kept on swinging. Eventually I felt her hands clasp around my neck, not holding back as she squeezed the oxygen from my body. "If I were you, I would behave. You never know what could happen. . . .To anyone." I know she means Kendall. My lips mouth the words 'where is he' but nothing happens, and my surroundings get fuzzy and soon after turn black as my mother still grasps my throat, slowly cutting off my source of life.

(Later)

I woke up in my room. Shocker. I was tucked in tightly and a cup of water was on the side table by my bed. I say up and wiped my eyes awake. It was still somewhat light out. Just about sunset I'd say, behind all of the storm clouds rolling in. As I got out of bed I noticed a note on my dresser. It read, "love you! –dad." Oh what I'd give to be able to believe that lie. I take the note and put it in my desk drawer with all of the other ones. My mouth is pretty dry but I'm not touching that water. My mother probably spiked it again. I'm not as stupid. I stretched a good stretch and yawned a good yawn. I noticed someone has brought my backpack upstairs from Kendall's house. Lovely. I wonder what type of lie they told to get Mrs. Knight to let me back over here. I slowly cracked open my bedroom door. Luckily it wasn't padlocked. I was actually expecting it to be. I peered out into the hall and heard my mother's voice coming from the upstairs bathroom.

"Get back in your room. I'll be in there in a few." Her voice sounded calm and polite, and I remembered that must mean her company has arrived. I closed my door and walked over to the window in my room. I looked at Kendall's house. Both of the cars are gone. His family is probably out looking for Kendall. My heart cracks at the thought of him lost somewhere if my mother just dropped him off in the middle of nowhere. My mother comes in and closes the door behind her.

"Mom, please tell me Kendall is alive. Can you at least tell me that?" I begged. She looked me in the eyes and said nothing. "Mom please, please say you didn't hurt him." I started to cry. Her silence was worrying me. I knew she did something. Her not replying to me was enough proof. I hung my head and let loose. I know my mother was watching me too. A few moments passed and I suddenly felt my mother's hand on my shoulder. I looked up through my tears.

"Do you wanna know about your friend?" she asked me.

"Yes, please mom! I do, I really really do," I pouted. She put both of her hands on my shoulders and frowned slightly. "Mom? Please! Tell me please!"

"Oh honey, I would love to tell you but, you just don't deserve to know," she said. I hated when she called me honey because I know she almost never means it the way it's supposed to be used.

"What do I have to do mom? Please tell me, I'll do anything to know that's he's okay!" I blabbered out.

"But what if he isn't okay?" she asked me. What is she inferring? That she did something? "Do you think you deserve to know after the way you behaved earlier?"

"No, I was a horrible person. I'm sorry. I just need to know about my friend, mom. I promise to be good," I was soaking my face and neck with my tears.

"Here's what we're gonna do, okay?" she said. I stopped crying for a minute to listen to her. I nodded my head. "I have my boss over for dinner tonight. It is really important to me that you stay out of the way completely. No coming downstairs, no asking me questions, nothing. When he leaves I'll tell you about your friend. You got that?"

"Yes, yes I promise mom. But please can you at least tell me that he's alive? That's all I need to know and I promise I'll be invisible to you and your boss for the rest of the night. I won't say a word. And I will come back here to live and tell Mrs. Knight that everything is okay. And I'll tell her to tell the police that nothing is wrong. You won't get in any trouble. I promise. Please just tell me." She paused for a minute.

"You don't speak a word," she said.

"I won't speak a word," I said.

"Then I will tell you this," she told me. I held my breath so not to miss a word. "He is alive but barely breathing." It's like my whole world was collapsing around me. But it was really just my mother shoving me off of the desk chair I was sitting on. I sat on the floor in stunned silence as my mother repeated 'you don't speak a word,' before closing the door tightly behind her. I silently cried for what seemed like hours. What did she do to Kendall? Why is he barely breathing? Where is he? I just hope my mother holds up her end of the deal tonight when her boss leaves.

(Later)

The guilt is eating me alive. My mother's boss had just left. I saw his car pull out of the driveway about fifteen minutes ago. I need to know what she did to Kendall. I heard my father watching TV downstairs and I heard my mother showering up here. I think I'm allowed to leave my room now but I don't want to take my chances of her not telling me what I need to know. Still…I check the clock. 6:58pm. That's all the time I need. My mother never said I couldn't ask my father anything. I silently tiptoed down the stairs, feeling the soft carpet rub against the cotton of my socks.

"Dad?" I asked. I saw him glance at the clock and then at me. "I still have time," I pointed out. He chuckled.

"A little bit. What do you need?" he asked me.

"Do you know what mom did to Kendall?" I asked. His face changed and I can tell he was uncomfortable talking about this, which made me worry even more. "Please tell me dad. I promise not to tell anybody you told me." I checked the clock. 6:59. "Please dad, tell me what you know!"

"I'm obligated to say nothing," he said.

"Please dad. I just need to know if he's alive," I said.

"I'm sworn to secrecy son. I'm sorry. I don't know what you're talking about," he said.

"Yes you do! You're in on it! What did you do to Kendall?" The clock hits 7:00pm and my father's lips are officially sealed. My father replied to me with the all-too familiar point of his finger in the direction of the upstairs. I got mad and yelled horrible things at my father who just ignored it by pointing upstairs again. I stomped all the way to my room and slammed the door. I jumped on my bed and screamed into my pillow. I punched the wall a few times and threw the glass of water against my dresser and soaked it with a splash. I don't think I've ever been this angry before. I threw my backpack and ripped up my school papers. I emptied all of my clothes out of my dresser and threw them against a wall. I just didn't care anymore. I threw a shirt and it hit my mother right in the face as she entered my room. I swallowed my stomach.

"What are you doing in here?" she asked me.

"Uhh nothing," I said quickly.

"Are you lying to me?" she asked.

"Yes," I said. "What happened to Kendall mom? Please tell me."

"Pick this shit up and go to bed. You get nothing you lying, worthless punk," she walked towards my door. "And if you ever punch the walls like that again, your friend will never see the light of day." She slammed the door on her way out. I lied in the filth of my room and soaked up the reality that I will never find Kendall, or find out what happened to him.

(Later)

I couldn't get my body to relax. I was so tired from today's events but I couldn't get my eyes to close. My mind was racing of all the possibilities of where Kendall could be, and what could be happening to him at this very moment. I tried to close my eyes and force myself asleep and eventually it worked, but not before I heard the most blood-curdling scream in my entire life. And that scream belonged to Kendall.

**Kendall's POV**

I can hear people nearby, but the sound is muffled out. Whatever that woman shot into my arm has totally altered my senses. My eyes see blurry and any sound is incoherent. I am lost in an unfamiliar room, strapped to a table as someone brings me warm water to drink. I'll take anything though. I can't remember the last time I was flourished with cool water, or wasn't sentenced to a lifelong-lasting headache.

"Where am I?" I asked the blurry figure before me. I squinted my eyes and tried to make out a figure of this person but a heavy blanket or something like it was thrown over my body and my face. I felt as if I was cooking from the inside out, and before long I was soaked in my own sweat. My arms are handcuffed to the wall above my head and my legs are strapped tightly to this table. I felt a sharp pinch in my side and let out a loud scream, or as loud as my voice would let me.

"Quiet you," the person said, hushing my yells. "Remember what I said. You don't say a word, or I'll kill him." I hushed my yells as a picture of this person comes to mind, hoping that this psychotic woman wouldn't hurt him. He doesn't deserve anything bad to happen to him. I just hope he's still safe in my house with my parents. The woman walked up the stairs back into her house and closed the basement door behind her. I heard a click, then footsteps above me, then nothing. I was left alone with nothing but the hopes of making it out alive and seeing my wonderful family again. You never know how lucky you really are, until you see life from someone else's view point.


	11. Piecing it Together

**A/N: Before I get into anything I want to say something. I understand this story is on a very sensitive subject and it may be uncomfortable to read for some of you, especially where it's about some of our favorite men in the world ;) lol..but I can't change the story line. I understand if you have to stop reading if anything gets to be too much for you, but it would ruin the whole plan I have for this if I all of a sudden made Logan's parents love him and start caring for him. Like I said before, I would never make it so that ANYONE died in this story. So don't worry! I'm not **_**that**_** insane :) Anyways…**

**Thank you to the guest reviewer "Logan" for giving me such sweet reviews on this story and on PB&J. You should make an account so I can PM you to thank you properly whenever you review! I always want to reply to your reviews like I do the other ones!**

**Also, how many of you were surprised about Kendall being in Logan's basement? Will Logan find out where he is before it's too late? :o**

**Disclaimer: Don't own Kogan (seeing how the other guys aren't really in this much)**

I know that scream belonged to Kendall last night. I just know it. Which means Kendall is nearby. Probably closer than I think. I've been walking around on eggshells all morning because I don't know what's gonna set my mother off and I definitely don't want her taking anything out on Kendall.

"You'll be walking today," my mother said as she left the house. I looked out of the living room window and saw my dad's car already gone.

"Great," I said to myself. "Better pack some extra clothes to change in to. It's pouring outside." I went upstairs to grab some extra shorts and a t-shirt. "Oh, I need an umbrella." I pondered about where this habit of talking to myself came from as I went downstairs. I walked towards the basement to grab an umbrella from the hook on the door. But the hook was gone. And it had been replaced but a lock. Weird.

"Mom?" I said, looking at the strange lock. She didn't answer me. "Oh yeah, she went outside." I ran to the living room window. "Mom, where are the umbrellas?" I know she could hear me; she just wants me to go out in the rain to ask her. Whatever, I'll fall for her trap this time. I went outside and knocked on her car door. She rolled down the window.

"What?" she asked.

"Where are the umbrellas?" I asked. This water was cold and I was already soaked.

"Ugh, do you really need one, Logan? You're fine to me," she said.

"I really would like one," I said. She shut off her car and got out, using one of her umbrellas. So, she needs one, but I'm considered fine. Lovely.

"Just wait here spoiled," she said to me. She unlocked the basement door and entered, closing the door behind her. I walked closer to the door and opened it.

"Mom, I could have gotten it. You didn't have to come all this way. You could have just given me the key," I said.

"Get upstairs!" I heard her voice yell to me. I walked down a couple of steps.

"Just tell me where they are mom, and I'll grab one. You can go off to work before you're late," I said. I'm trying to help her, but I'm only hurting myself.

"Get upstairs now! Get upstairs now!" she yelled again. I flinched at her tone and turned to go upstairs. She came at me with an umbrella.

"Whoa," I said, stumbling up a step.

"Take it and go! Just get out! I don't want to see your face when I get up there. You better be gone!" I ran up the stairs as fast as I could. It's like I could feel her body chasing me up the stairs even though she stayed behind down there. I gathered my extra clothes and stuffed them in my backpack. Almost falling down the stairs, I ran out the front door and up the street. I didn't stop running until I knew for sure that she couldn't get me. Then I stopped to catch my breath.

"Phew," I said. "That was so weird."

(Later)

I went to the gym locker room so I could change into my dry clothes. Even though I used the umbrella, I still got pretty wet from running. I overheard a conversation as I was putting my wet clothes in my bag.

"Yeah, dude he's been missing since yesterday," one kid said. I acted like I was packing my bag still even though I was done. I just didn't want to be accused of eavesdropping. Even though I totally was.

"I know, I got the call last night," the other kid said. "It said if we see or hear anything we should notify the police." What call? I didn't get a call yesterday. Or maybe I did and my mother didn't tell me. Why would she though? This is her fault. I should tell somebody. But if I do, she'll hurt him. My head started to hurt.

"Are you guys talking about Kendall?" I asked walking over. I hung my backpack around one shoulder to try to blend in. I only made myself look awkward.

"Yeah. There's a missing person's report filed for him," the first kid said. "There are flyers hanging up all over the place." He pointed behind me and I turned around to see a flyer with Kendall's face on it. I walked over to it and just stared. It made me so sad. To know that my mother is the cause of everyone's distress. I just wish I knew where he was. If I ever found out, maybe I could do something without my mother knowing. The two boys followed me.

"I hear later the cops are going door to door in his neighborhood to see if anyone's seen or heard anything," the other kid said. I gulped hard.

"Really? Like, every house?" I asked. Both boys nodded.

"And what if they don't get any leads? What will happen then?" I asked.

"Who knows?" the other boy said. "Maybe do interviews in the school? Call some kids down. Hard to say though. This never happened at our school before."

"Yeah, everyone knows everybody here," the first boy added in. "Which is why it's so weird that no one's found him yet." I start to feel that guilty feeling again. Oh how I wish I could just confide in these boys and tell them everything. But who knows what they would do? They probably turn me in for not saying anything about my mother. Doesn't that make me an accomplice though? I try not to think about it and I walk out of the gym locker room towards my locker and I shove my bag in there. I really just don't know what to do.

(Later)

All of the thinking from today has given me a headache. The thought of actually being considered a criminal just because I know that my mother is behind all of this makes me sick. I don't know what she's doing though. Or what she did do. I stop my thoughts from continuing. I grab my lunch tray and make my way around the buffet. I don't even feel like eating but as I always say, you never know when your next meal will be. I grab a salad and a cup of strawberries, and milk. As I walk over to Kendall's usual table I feel a very depressing vibe. Everyone here seems worried.

"Hey Logan," pretty much everybody said to me as I sat down.

"Hi," I said. I didn't really talk much during lunch. I just kind of picked at my food. The whole lunchroom was quiet. Well, I mean there was chatter, but nothing like the usual clamors. The somewhat-silence was interrupted by Assistant Principal Prestes' voice over the intercom. They're letting school out early because of the Tropical Storm. I looked out the window and noticed the torrential rail we were getting slammed with. Walking home in that should be fun. I looked around the lunchroom for Blenny. Whenever I felt anxious he always seemed to calm me down. Probably because he's so weird and is always entertaining with his ability to constantly talk on a whim. I couldn't find him though. Probably getting his head flushed in a toilet again.

(Later)

I'm not even gonna tell you about how it was walking home because it was just awful. I left my shoes on the porch because I don't want them dripping in the house. Same with my backpack. I changed out of my newly wet clothes and dropped them in the hamper with my other wet clothes. I looked in the mirror in the bathroom and stared. I could kind of see the cuts I made. I try not to think of it. It will only give me the urge. I knocked on my mother's bedroom door and didn't get an answer. Even though her car isn't here, you can never be so sure. I opened my mother's door slowly and stepped inside. It's cool in here. Even in this weather, she still has the air conditioning on. I can feel the goosebumps forming on my arms and legs.

"I just need a shirt," I said to myself. I opened my father's drawers and looked for a large shirt to put on. I grabbed the first one I could get my hands on and I closed the drawer and made sure I didn't leave any crumbs from my socks or anything on the floor. My mother would decapitate me.

I sat in the living room in my father's chair. I liked being defiant when my parents weren't home. My father's shirt was long enough on me to cover my wounds. I saw my mother's car pull up and I started to panic. She definitely saw me in my father's chair. I ran up the stairs and flew myself onto my bed. I wrapped myself in my blanket and covered my body up to my neck. I heard the front door slam shut and I heard footsteps coming my way.

"Logan?" my mother asked.

"Yes mom?" I replied.

"Were you downstairs at all?" she asked me.

"Yeah. I'm sorry mom. I just needed to rest. I sat in dad's chair, but only for about a minute I promise!" I said. She didn't get mad at me though.

"Okay. Just stay up here okay?" she asked me. And she left. What? That was it? I got up and went to the top of the staircase.

"Wait mom? Can I get something to eat?" I asked.

"Yes but make it quick," she said irritated. I flew down the stairs and opened the fridge. I wanted to take my time, but I can feel my mom watching me. I decided to get a pudding cup. I love pudding.

"Mom, can I have pudding?" I asked.

"Yeah, whatever," she said. "Just get upstairs." She was leaning on the basement door.

"Okay, thanks mom," I said. I grabbed a spoon and went upstairs. Pudding is great. I like tapioca pudding the best. Although I wonder what the little beads are. Maybe it's best not to know. I tried to make the pudding last but it's just too good. I gulped it down in like five bites. I placed the empty pudding cup on my desk and stared at Kendall's house. I really hope he's okay wherever he is. Then that scream happened again. My heart stopped. That was too close by. Suddenly everything was coming back to me. My mother stopped me from going in the basement, she said she could do anything to Kendall at any given moment if I misbehave, she didn't care that I was in my dad's shirt sitting in my dad's chair, and she was leaning on the basement door waiting for me to go back upstairs. I barged out of my room and down the stairs. I think my feet only touched one stair. I tried to rip open the basement door but it was locked from the other side. I kicked the door repeatedly and screamed horrible things at my mother. I heard another one of those blood-curdling Kendall screams. I ran from the living room and slammed into the basement door. After the sixth try the door broke off its hinge and I went tumbling down the steps. I hurt myself really bad, but I tried not to show it as I stood up. My mother was standing by a table with a bunch of tools in her hand. Her face was one I've never seen before.

"Excuse me?" she asked me.

"Where's Kendall?" I demanded.

"I don't know this person you speak of," my mother said condescendingly. She walked towards me, as if to usher me back upstairs. I wouldn't budge though. She put her hands on me and tried to push me back towards the stairs.

"No, don't touch me," I said. I avoided her and really hurt myself in the process. Still, I ran over to the table and yanked the blanket off. Underneath was Kendall, and I couldn't control the loud cry that left my mouth. The look in his eyes was one of pure fright and pain, but a tiny bit of relief. I got lost in those beautiful eyes of his and my mother hit me with a cheap shot to the back of my knee. I went down. And I couldn't get my body to get back up. I felt my mother's foot on my back and I yelped out in pain. She kicked me hard in the side and the impact sent me rolling into some empty paint cans.

"Stay where you are or I'll kill you both," my mother said. This was the craziest I've seen her. She was a completely different person. Still, I figured enough was enough and I stayed still. I didn't want Kendall to get hurt any longer. My back was facing her and Kendall and his screams increased. I couldn't turn around though. I didn't want to see what she was doing to him. It seemed like hours of his screams when by when my mother hit me over the head with something hard. Like a chair. Then everything went black.


	12. The Cold Shoulder

**A/N: Thanks for all the reviews and follows/faves :) Not much to say here except enjoy! :)**

***Warning* This chapter may be rated more M for violence and for hints at offensive, derogatory terms**

**Disclaimer: Don't own the BTR dudes**

My vision was blurry as I opened my eyes. I felt as if I had been asleep all year. I blinked numerous times so I could figure out where I was. Oh yeah. I'm in the basement now. I was lying in the same spot I was in when my mother hit me in the head. I rolled over onto my back and took a couple of deep breaths. That was the worst I've seen my mother in years! She never treated me _that_ bad before, and that's saying something.

I sat up and pushed the empty paint cans out of the way and rested my back against the cold wall. It felt kind of good. When I looked up I saw Kendall lift his head, looking at me. I forgot he was here for a moment. I don't know how, because he's the reason I came down here in the first place.

"Kendall," I said standing up. I got dizzy from getting up too fast and I stumbled a bit. He looked deeply concerned. Eventually I made my way over to him. He had clear packaging tape wrapped roughly around his head, covering his mouth. Something white was sticking out of his mouth, showing through the tape. "Want me to get that off of you?" I asked. He just continued to stare at me with those fierce, worried eyes. "Right, you can't actually answer me. I'll do it anyway. I'll try to be as careful as I can." I put my hand behind his head and tried to find the end of the tape. I found it right under his really cute left ear. I unwrapped the tape three times around his head before it all came off. He immediately spit out the white thing that was showing through the tape. It was an old sock. He coughed and choked but eventually settled down.

"Are you okay Kendall?" I asked. He just looked at me with sad eyes. He looked so uncomfortable on that table, his arms hung awkwardly above his head. "I'll see if I can get a key for those," I said. His head followed me as I went towards the stairs. He didn't try to stop me though. I'll be back Kendall." I twisted the door knob only to find it locked. No shock there. I knocked a couple times and heard some shuffling around on the other side but no one unlocked the door.

"Mom?" I called out. There was some more shuffling but again, no one opened the door. "Mom, can I go to the bathroom please?" I asked. Silence. I sighed and walked back down the stairs. "No one answered me up there. I'll try to see what I can do." I said to him. He looked awkward and he kicked his legs. He was getting me worried. I went closer to him. "Are you okay? Please talk to me." He stretched out his neck and kicked his legs again. "Oh!" I removed the comforter my mother threw on him and he stopped kicking. "You better now?" I asked him. He just looked at me. "Kendall, I'm so sorry my mother is putting you through this. I'm so sorry. And it's all my fault. If I wasn't such a coward and just told somebody, you'd probably be out by now." I threw some can of something and it hit the wall with a crash, making Kendall flinch. I mentally apologized to him. There were footsteps above us, then the click from the lock being removed, then footsteps coming downstairs. Kendall made a whimper sound and as much as I wanted to crawl in a hole and hide, I stood where I was next to him, shielding him.

"You have to pee?" my father asked me. I was somewhat happier to see him than my mother.

"Dad, can you get us out of here? Please?" I asked. He just sighed. "Please dad."

"Loges, I'm only allowed to let you to the bathroom," he said. I couldn't believe how weak he was.

"Well, I'm sure Kendall has to go too," I said. My dad looked at him then back at me.

"Sorry buddy, nothing I can do. Are you going or not?" he asked. My blood boiled and part of me wanted to yell horrible things at him, but I said yes and went upstairs with him. He walked me to the bathroom, not letting go of my shoulder until I was fully inside the room. I didn't even have to pee but I did it anyway. I looked at myself in the mirror after I flushed. One of my pupils was way bigger than the other one. Not sure what that means. There was a knock at the door.

"Logan, you done yet?" my mother asked. The sound of her voice makes me want to slam my face in a car door repeatedly.

"Yes ma'am," I said. I opened the door and she was waiting there impatiently. I stood out in the kitchen taking in the dark and dreary weather scene happening outside. My mother was still watching me though so I went for the basement door. "How long do I have to stay down there?" I asked walking down a step.

"Until you learn your lesson," she said simply. I choked on my saliva.

"What do you mean by that?" I asked in between coughs.

"I mean, you can come out once your friend is no longer with us," she said. She slammed the door in my face and locked it. I just stood there in disbelief. She is doing this to him to get back at me? This is really all my fault. She wants to kill him.

"Kendall?" I said, coming down the stairs. He still just looked at me sadly. "I think we're gonna be here for a while."

(Later)

I tried everything I could think of to get Kendall to talk to me but he just wouldn't. It's like he's mad at me for some reason. I guess I don't blame him. I'd be mad at me too. I ruin everything. I reached into my pocket and felt the cool blade across my finger tips. I pulled it out and held it in the palm of my hand. I didn't bother checking to see if Kendall was looking because he probably was, and he still didn't say anything. I lifted my shirt and drew a line across my chest. I heard a loud bang come from upstairs and that made me press a little harder than I wanted to, making a deep puncture right above my belly button. I dropped my shirt and looked up at Kendall who was eyeing me with wide worried eyes.

"Kendall, why won't you talk to me anymore?" I whined. He didn't budge. He just kept that look of worry on his face. "I'm sorry for hurting you," I said. I went over to him and gazed into his beautiful rays of sunshine that are his eyes. "I'm so sorry Kendall. Please don't be mad at me." I did the only thing my gut was telling me to do. I leant down and planted a kiss on his forehead. He looked at me, shocked. But he still said nothing.

"Logan!" my father's voice yelled from above.

"Yes, dad?" I called out, still standing over Kendall. My father didn't respond. "I'll be right back Kendall." I walked towards the stairs and stopped at the bottom of them. "Dad?" He waved his hand motioning me to come up. Hesitatingly, I took a step up, and another one, and another one until I was one step below my father. He grabbed me by my shoulders and pulled me closer to him. I was about to throw myself backwards and fall down the stairs. . . . again, when I realized he was pulling me in for a hug. I accepted it although I was really confused. One minute he's keeping me hostage and siding with my mother, the next minute he's hugging me.

"I love you," he said to me. He rubbed up and down my back. I didn't really feel comfortable saying it back to him so I just stood there, him holding me. After a few minutes he released me and dropped something in my hands, closing them as his hand released from mine. He placed an envelope in my other hand. I looked at it, confused, my other hand still clenched in a fist. I looked at my father to answer my unasked question. He placed a finger over his mouth and ushered me back down the stairs. When I got down to the bottom, I looked back up at him and he put his finger over his mouth again and then closed the door. I went back over to Kendall who was looking at me eagerly.

"My father gave me a letter I think," I said. His eyes were on my closed fist though. I had already forgotten about that. I opened it and saw a small key in the palm of my hand. Kendall's eyes darted from the key to my face and back again. I unlocked the cuffs holding Kendall's arms above his head and he sat upright, rubbing his wrists. He eyeballed the envelope in my hand. I was almost afraid to open it. Who knows what could be inside? I know, I know. I'll never find out unless I open it. "I'm scared to open it Kendall. What if it's a death threat?" I sat down on the table Kendall was lying on to steady my nerves. He inched farther away from me. My heart cried a little. "Okay, I'll open it." I could feel my heartbeat in my throat as I ripped open the envelope and pulled out a piece of paper. After all the anxiety this gave me, it turned out to be just one of my dad's pointless reminders:

"I love you! –dad" I read out loud. I crumpled the piece of paper and threw it over my shoulder. I guess it's better than a death threat but I almost thought my dad was giving me something to help us down here. Kendall hopped off of the table and retrieved the paper. His walking was very unsteady, but he made it back without falling. I looked at him quizzically. He unfolded the paper and smoothed it out on the table. I looked at him looking at the paper. He studied it carefully.

"What are you doing?" I asked him. He didn't answer me. His eyes never left the paper. "I already read it out loud. Why do you need to keep reading it?" he lifted his head and looked me in the eyes, and then lowered his head again. He turned the paper over and I noticed more words on that side. "What does it say?" I asked him. He didn't answer me, but he stood up reading the paper. After a few moments, he handed it to me with a smile. I took it from him and read it over. I couldn't believe what it was saying. Then I read it out loud.

"Door is unlocked today. Feel free to come up." I looked at Kendall who was staring at the ceiling. You can hear footsteps coming from up there. "Kendall, I don't know about this." I said. He looked at me. "My dad is weird. He could be trying to trick us." He looked unimpressed and headed for the stairs. "Kendall no, please stay here with me!" he didn't turn around but kept up the stairs. I followed him. He got to the top of the staircase and put his ear towards the door. I covered my mouth in fear that my mom would hear my breathing. Then Kendall knocked on the door. "Kendall no! Are you crazy?" I made my way up to the top and moved him out of the way. If anyone answered the door, I wouldn't want Kendall to get hurt. He wouldn't move though, he just stepped to the side. I heard footsteps, then the click of the lock, then the door squeaked open revealing my mother.

"What do you want? And how are you up here?" she hissed, mostly at Kendall.

"Uhh, uhh," I stammered, trying to find what to say. I looked to Kendall who looked out over my mother.

"I'm losing such interest Logan, you better tell me what you want," she said. I couldn't get another word out before Kendall bolted past my mother running towards the front door. My mother ran after him but couldn't catch up so she turned and grabbed me in a head lock. "You take one more step and I break his neck!" She shouted at him. He stopped at the doorway and looked back at me. I tried not to look as pathetic as I was, but I couldn't do anything to help it. He looked out the front door and back at me.

"Kendall, just go," I managed to get out. Obviously that's all he needed because he didn't waste any time bolting out the front door without closing it behind him. I looked out the living room windows and saw him running right across the street and into his house without looking back once. My mother let go of me by throwing me on the floor. She walked upstairs after that. I wasn't sure what I should do, so I just laid there on the floor until I passed out.

(Later)

I woke up in my bed, tucked in as usual per my father. I sat up straight and rubbed my eyes. It was bright outside, like early morning; maybe 6am. I went over to the window by my desk and stared outside. Both of Kendall's cars were there. I am so nervous for school today. I went downstairs to the bathroom and brushed my teeth. All of the lights in the house were off. That's weird for my family because my mother's usually upstairs in the bathroom using every single electrical outlet for her hair, and my father's down here cooking or watching tv, or both. I looked on the counter. No breakfast was left for me. Another weird thing. No matter how bad things get here, my dad always leaves me something. Even if it's just a tortilla smothered in maple syrup or peanut butter.

"Dad?" I called out. The TV was off in the living room too. Another weird thing. I went to the living room windows and noticed my mother's car and my father's car were both gone. I went over to my mother's bedroom door and knocked quietly. "Mom? Are you in here?" I asked. I pushed the door open slightly and peeked inside. All of her bedding was stripped off of the sheets, and her dresser drawers were raided empty. My father's too. They just left me here. Both of them this time. I returned to the living room and sat in my father's chair and cried. Even though I'm probably the safest now than I've ever been in my entire life, I felt abandoned and vulnerable. I just sat there for hours. Eventually it came time for me to leave for school. I was probably gonna be a few minutes late for first period but I didn't care. I didn't even bother changing my clothes. I grabbed my backpack and started up the street.

(Later)

Got chewed out big time for being late but I didn't care. I pretty much cried all day except for in lunch. I did not want those bullies to see me like this. I didn't really have the appetite for anything but I grabbed some macaroni and cheese anyway. I sat down at the table and no one said hi to me this time. I looked at everyone's faces and no one even looked my way. I turned and saw Kendall coming this way with his lunch. He sat down in front of me. No one really said a word to me during lunch, even when I tried to join in on the conversation.

"Kendall?" I said. He just looked at me and looked away almost immediately. He was talking to everybody else there but not me. "Why are you ignoring me?" I whispered, so that not really anyone could hear me. I turned around and looked for Blenny. He was at his usual table, alone. My ear caught part of the conversation everyone was having.

"I'm just so glad you're okay Kendall," Melissa said.

"Me too," he gushed at her.

"Me too," I added. He looked at me and I could tell he wanted to say something, but he just kept talking with the others. I slowly heard my heart cracking into a million pieces but I ignored it. The lunch bell rang and I threw my trash away and tried catching up to Kendall so we could walk together like we usually do. "Wait up!" I said. He didn't stop walking but I eventually caught up to him. "Are you mad at me Kendall?" I asked. He didn't answer me. "Kendall, you know I thought something was wrong with you when you weren't talking to me yesterday? I thought you were so hurt, you lost the ability to talk." He still said nothing. I looked at him and he just looked forward, walking and acting like I wasn't even there. "You know it's not my fault right? I would never do something like that to you," I said. He still just kept walking. It was hard to walk and talk and look at him at the same time but I managed I guess. I tried asking him another question but he sighed right through the middle of it so I could tell he really wasn't listening to me. "Okay, well I'll see you later then," I said. He turned down a hallway and I stopped at my locker. There was a large piece of paper on it, with a name so hurtful I wanted to die. I tore down the paper and ripped it into shreds as people walked by laughing, calling me this horrible three-letter word. Someone even threw an apple at me. Nobody knows about the way I am so only Kendall could have said something. He must have told people I kissed him.

(Later)

I wallowed in self-pity as I drew several deep gashes everywhere on my body. I didn't care where they were anymore. There's no one to hide it from. Kendall knows and doesn't care, my parents are gone. Today was a horrible day at school. I sat up in my father's chair and finished the picture I was drawing on my left forearm. It was a tree, kind of. A naked tree with branches swaying in every direction. I wished for nothing but for Kendall to forgive me. I heard a loud bang outside and I looked out the window. There was a tiny car in front of Kendall's house. I recognized that as Melissa's car. I put my shirt back on and went out on the front porch. I saw her and Kendall put something in her trunk and then close it. I walked down to my mailbox and pretended to look for mail even though it came about 5 hours ago. They put a couple of bags in the backseat of her car then both got in and drove away. A child, one of his sisters who was maybe six was standing on the grass waving as the car disappeared down the street. I went over there.

"Where is Kendall going?" I asked the child.

"He's going somewhere safe away from the crazy neighbors," she replied. She skipped back inside leaving me to realize I was the only crazy neighbor on this street.

**Hope this one was good! How do you feel about Kendall? Is he handling this in the right way? Will he change his mind? Review :)**


	13. The Cold Shoulder (Kendall's POV)

**A/N: Shocker with that last one, huh? Got a lot of really great reviews! Thanks for those. :) Enjoy the first full chapter with a POV change! ;)**

***Warning* Contains abusive flashback**

**Disclaimer: Don't own the guys. You know, you know.**

**Kendall's POV *18 hours earlier***

I'm still not sure how to feel about this whole situation. I know it's not his fault, and I'm not trying to take it out on him either. I just don't know how to deal with it. Logan's father gave him a letter that said we were safe to come upstairs. This would probably be my only chance at getting back home, and he's freaking out.

"Kendall no! Are you crazy?" he asked me. I just went up the stairs and pushed past him. I put my ear against the door and listened. I didn't hear anything so I knocked. I heard some footsteps and then the lock unlocking, and then the door opened. His mom answered.

"What do you want?" she yelled at him. He didn't respond so she turned to me. "And how did you get up here?" I had no interest in pursuing a conversation with her so I just looked to see if the coast was clear. Besides her blocking my way, the path to the front door was free of any obstruction. "I'm losing such interest Logan; you better tell me what you want." He's just stammering, which is perfect because I can almost taste the freedom. I go with my gut and push right past her, not looking back until I get to the door. I hear her after me, running close behind but she's not fast enough. "You take one more step, and I break his neck!" The sound of her words chills my spine. I turn around and see her holding him tightly, his head facing a complete 225 degrees, and knew she wasn't joking. I don't take another step.

"Kendall, just go," he said to me. I figured he would know the best way to deal with it so I went with it. I bolted out his front door, right across the street, and into my house, slamming and locking the door behind me.

"Kendall's back," my sister cheered. I just wanted to curl up in my bed. She ran over to me and hugged me. "Where have you been?"

"With a friend," I said, barely hugging her back. I heard my mother say something and emerge from the kitchen shortly after.

"Kendall! Baby," she said coming over to me. She engulfed me in a tight hug and I hugged her back. She planted several kisses on the top and sides of my head. "Kendall, where were you?"

"I was with Logan," I said vaguely.

"Are you alright? Why haven't you been answering your phone?" She held my shoulders and brought me over to the couch and sat me down.

"I don't really want to talk about it around here," I said pointing at my sisters watching TV. She looked at me worriedly and took me by the hand leading me into her bedroom.

"Kendall, talk to me baby," she said. She knew I was hesitant. She always does. She can like, sense these things. I kept looking over my shoulders. I now know what Logan feels like every hour of the day.

"I don't want anybody to get in trouble," I said.

"Well, you have to tell me everything anyway," my mother said to me.

"Logan's mother stopped me after school the other day," I started. My mother nodded her head, not taking her eyes off of me. "And she told me if I don't get in her car, she'd hurt me." I paused, shuddering at the memory. "And I still refused so she got out of the car and wrestled me to get me in. She eventually got me because she stuck something in my arm and I got really sleepy." I held out my arm to show her the mark. "The next thing I knew, I was in Logan's basement, handcuffed to the wall, sweating to death."

"Oh, honey," she said. She patted my thigh and wrapped me in another hug. "Did she hurt you any other way?"

"Well, yeah," I said lifting up my shirt, showing my side.

"Oh my God, Kendall!" My mother exasperated. She lightly touched the burn marks that witch left on my side every night I was there. "We need to call the police!"

"No!" I said. I stood up and pulled down my shirt. "Everything is fine now! I'm home safe. It's all over. That's all that matters!"

"Sweetie," she said in a quieter tone, trying to calm me down. "She cannot get away with this."

"If I just pretend nothing ever happened, no one gets hurt," I said. "I'm fine now mom. It's all in the past. I just want to move on and forget this ever happened. I can't do that with cops cramming their questions down my throat."

"Honey, I understand that. Believe me, I do. But I can't just ignore what happened to you," she said.

"Mom, please," I begged. "All I need right now is sleep. A good, interrupted sleep. I don't want to talk about this anymore. I'm not telling anyone. I refuse to. So, call the cops if you want to waste your time. I'll say nothing." She looked upset that I was being this stubborn but she let me sleep.

"We'll give it some time, okay?" she told me. "You do look like you need some rest." She tussled my hair. I allowed my eyelids to droop.

"Can I sleep in here?" I asked.

"Of course," she said. She kissed my cheek and held me tight for a moment or two. I don't even know what time it is, but I still got under the covers and passed out within a minute of my mother stroking my hair.

(Later)

I woke up alone in my parents' bedroom. I forgot falling asleep in there. I sat up and stretched and rubbed my sore side. I could smell bacon coming from the kitchen. Must be morning.

I still can't believe what's happened in the last two or three days. And I can't believe Logan kissed me. I mean, I just didn't expect it. I guess it wasn't like, a full-blown kiss that turned into a make-out session but still. . . .his lips touched my forehead. I texted Melissa and told her.

_K: Hey guess what_

_M: OMG Kendall!_

_M: Where are you?_

_M: Are you alright?_

_K: I'm fine now._

_K: Home safe everything's fine. But guess what_

_M: omg Kendall thank god. My family was so worried._

_M: what?_

_K: Someone kissed me the other day_

_M: umm…who?_

_K: Logan_

_M: Mitchell? OMG_

_K: ya_

_M: like was it an actual kiss?_

_K: yeah I think so_

_M: LOL what did u do or say?_

_K: nothing I was pretty startled that I didn't do anything_

_M: awww Kendall u have a boyfriend :* :)_

_K: ya right_

_K: eating breakfast soon. talk to u later_

_M: k u coming to school today?_

_K: most likely see ya then_

I got out of bed and made my way downstairs.

"Good morning, honey," my mother said as I sat at the table with everyone else. She took my yawning as good morning. "Did you sleep well?"

"Yeah, I actually did," I said. She smiled and filled my plate with bacon, eggs, and toast. I ate until I couldn't take another bite. The last time I tasted something besides warm water was school lunch a few days back. "Can I stay home from school today?"

"Why, are you sick?" she asked me, worriedly.

"No, I just don't feel like going," I said. She looked at me frankly. "I just know everyone's gonna be asking me questions and I don't want to deal with it."

"If Kendall stays home, I get to too because it won't be fair," my sister said.

"Yeah me too," said my other two, in unison.

"Nobody is staying home," my mother said. I pouted a little in my head only because I know what today is gonna bring.

After breakfast I gathered my things and got in my mom's minivan. We rode to school in silence, dropping the younger ones off first. Well, I was silent. My mother made conversation with my sisters. When we pulled up the driveway to my school I sighed.

"Oh sweetie, you'll be fine," she said to me. I just ignored her. I can tell she can sense my unhappiness so she suggested I skip hockey practice today.

"I already missed so much, I'm surprised I'm still on the team," I said. After a few a few moments of sulking, I got out of the car and went into the building. And school went just how I expected it to. Until lunch that is.

(Later)

It's been hard avoiding the questions people have been asking me. I just will nod my head at them, laugh it off, or ignore them completely. I forgot to pack my lunch today too, so I'm stuck with paying five dollars for whatever "meat" is in this chicken patty. As I head for my table I see Logan sitting there and there's only one spot left at the table: right in front of him. I consider switching tables altogether, but that would be too obvious. I decide to just suck it up and sit down anyway.

"Hey everyone," I said.

"Hi Kendall," pretty much everyone replied. Logan just looked at me. Lunch was okay. Thank God I have great friends who won't pester me about what happened.

"Kendall?" Logan said. I didn't really want to talk to him because I know what it would turn in to so I just looked at him but quickly looked away.

"I'm just so glad you're okay Kendall," Melissa said to me.

"Me too," I said.

"Me too," Logan said. I looked at him again, not knowing what to say or do. So I just continued talking with Melissa while texting her at the same time.

_K: What do I do? He keeps trying to talk to me!_

_M: Just tell him u need your space_

_K: I don't want to hurt his feelings tho. I think it's better if I just ignore him for now_

_M: Well regardless, he'll be upset so, u gotta do what u gotta do I guess._

I laughed at the conversation happening at the table to not make what I'm doing so obvious. Melissa did the same. Logan stopped trying altogether so that's some relief for me for now.

_K: I guess so._

The lunch bell rang and I packed up my barely touched lunch and threw it out, and left the lunchroom as fast as I could but I could still hear his voice.

"Wait up!" I heard. I just kept walking, pretending I couldn't hear him. "Are you mad at me Kendall?" I still didn't answer. I just don't know what to say. It's better if I say nothing; the easier it is for me to get over this. "Kendall, you know I thought something was wrong with you when you weren't talking to me yesterday? I thought you were so hurt, you lost the ability to talk." Okay, that kinda makes me feel guilty. Still, I have to show that I want no part in talking about it. I just kept looking forward, not even laying an eye on him, and focused on my destination. He started to say something else but stopped. I think he finally caught on. "Okay, well I'll see you later then." I turned down a hall I don't normally take. I just needed to get away from that. I don't know what else to do. I heard laughing behind me and I could tell it was directed at him but whatever at this point. I just want to go home.

(Later)

"I told you mom, today was like the worst day of my life. Logan would not stop trying to talk to me. I just have to get away for a little bit," I said.

"Well, where are you going to go? You can't go to gram and gramps house. There's no way you'll be able to make it to school from there," she said.

"What if I can stay with a friend?" I said. She rolled her eyes slightly. "I promise no funny business mom. I'll be responsible about it. I'll make sure I get all my work done. Please mom? Just until this bull goes away?" I can tell she was hesitant but she agreed. I called up Melissa and asked her if I could spend a couple nights there and she agreed. Gotta love that girl. She came and I packed up some stuff in her car. I said goodbye to my mother again and she told me to be safe and hugged me tightly. I got in her car and we drove away. I saw Logan come outside through the rearview mirror and I know he saw me leave. Whatever. One less problem I have to deal with now.

**Do you all get Kendall's point now? Do you still think he's doing the wrong thing? How is Logan dealing with this? Review :)**


	14. All I Needed

**A/N: Loved all of your responses! Seriously! :) Enjoy!**

**Note: If the storyline confuses you, don't be afraid to PM me! I explained it to a couple of readers just to clear up any misunderstandings.**

**Disclaimer: Nope, not yet.**

**Logan's POV *1 Week Later* (Present Day)**

I'm not even gonna tell you about my morning because when do I ever have a good one? I'm sitting in Mr. Lang's class right now trying to focus on taking these notes about connotations versus denotations. It's not really working. I didn't really get much sleep last night because I was focused too much on what Kendall's sister had said. The Knights think I'm crazy. Kendall thinks I'm crazy. And he doesn't want to be my friend anymore. My heart was crying inside.

"You okay" Blenny asked me.

"Yeah," I said not wanting to get into it.

"So, is it true?" he asked.

"Is what true?" I asked kind of turning my head to the side, but without taking my eyes off of my notes.

"That you're. . . .you know what?" he whispered. I looked at him.

"No," I said.

"Okay," he said.

"But just out of curiosity," I continued. "What would you do if you found out one of your friends was?" He shrugged his shoulders.

"I don't know, man. Probably nothing. I don't know. You're my only friend," he said. I nodded my head. "Why? Do you know somebody who is?"

"No," I said almost immediately. I shook my head vigorously. It was so obvious I did know someone, a couple someones. Luckily I'm talking to Blenny. He would never catch on.

(Later)

I don't even like coming to lunch anymore because Kendall never talks to me. No one does. But I only really care about Kendall. I just wish he would say at least _something_ to me. I haven't gotten a single word from him since he told me he was walking straight home and didn't wanna wait for me when Principal Morgan wanted to see me. I miss the sound of his sweet voice when it's directed at me. I guess I'll never experience that again. I didn't bring any money for lunch either so I just sat there pretty much, and rested my head on the table. Hearing Kendall laugh with everyone else was torture. I'm glad he's happy though, I really am. I just want one word.

"So how is everything now that you moved Kendall?" Erica said.

"Good I guess," Kendall said. "There are definitely more. . . .strict people there."

"What do you mean 'strict'?" Melissa said, laughing.

"Well, for instance, that one guy who yelled at me for leaving your mailbox door down," he said laughing as well.

"Oh yeah, Chuck," Melissa said. "Always watch out for him. He'll chase you down just to tell you that you left your light on all night." Everyone laughs but me. I don't even try anymore. I look at Kendall's face and it's happy. That's all I need to see I guess. The lunch bell rings and I miserably make my way to the next class. I don't bother catching up to Kendall either. I know I'm just bothering him.

(Later)

I walk home alone and listen to the sounds my footsteps make as they touch the wet pavement. I skip over the cracks, even if it is a dumb superstition. I would never want to hurt my mother that way. No matter how much she may "deserve" it. I'll use that word loosely. No one deserves anything bad to happen to them. They deserve to get rescued. I hope my parents get rescued from their behavior. I unlocked my front door and stepped inside. With the cooler weather coming, I've been sleeping in my sweatshirts and pants. I need to start looking for a job now too, because I can't afford any of the bills that keep coming in the mail. I paid off one but I had to bust open my savings bank in order to do it though. Poor piggy. As much as I like not having to walk around on egg shells in my house anymore, I still kind of miss my parents. I can't help but wonder where they are or what they're doing.

I looked in the fridge for something to snack on even though I know it's empty. I finished the last piece of cheese for breakfast this morning. I stood on the counter, still looking over my shoulder just in case. There wasn't much in the cabinets either. I found a box of Triscuit crackers, my least favorite, but I took them anyway.

I sadly nibbled on the basket-textured crisps and wallowed in my own despair. I can't even remember not being sad anymore. It's just a constant thing now. Sitting in my father's chair, I look out the window at Kendall's house. Mrs. Knight probably hates me too. I just hate this whole situation. I want to go back to how things were. I would much rather deal with my parents every day and have Kendall by my side than have neither want me.

I thought of what I was going to do tomorrow for lunch. I don't have any money, and there's nothing here to eat expect these baskets. Guess I'm having nothing again.

(Later)

I woke up curled in a ball on my father's chair. I must have fallen asleep early yesterday and slept through the night. I sat upright and rubbed my eyes. It was kind of cold in my house. Well, not really cold like winter, just chilly. I pulled my shirt down to cover my knees but it made its way back to its regular shape and form within a minute. I do not want to go to school today. I dread it. If I could have just one day where kids didn't call me horrible names or if Kendall actually talked to me, I'd be happy enough to actually want to stay alive.

I took off my shirt and threw it on the hamper in the bathroom. If you actually want to call it a hamper; it's got so much clothes in it, it looks like a cave of smelly material. I grab my toothbrush and put the toothpaste on it. When I turned on the faucet to wet it, I noticed nothing came out. Another bill I couldn't afford. I threw my toothbrush in the sink angrily. I sat on the floor in the living room not knowing what else to do. I just waited until it was close to the time I leave for school. When the time came, I decided to check the fridge just in case something magically appeared there overnight. Nothing did, and I don't know why I got as upset as I did.

(Later)

The first half of the day wasn't _too_ bad, but it still would be better if I had something to eat. I was walking to my usual spot at the lunch table and I noticed that everyone was sitting one table to the left. There were books stacked where I usually sit.

"Uhh…excuse me," I said softly. Melissa turned around and looked at me, but didn't say anything. "Excuse me," I said again in an equal tone. "Can I sit here? I usually do at that table, but you guys moved."

"Um, sorry. I'm saving this seat for someone," she said to me. She sounded phony.

"Okay," I said. I just stood there not knowing where else to go. I looked for Blenny but he wasn't there, again. I sometimes felt bad for using him as a last resort, but we almost never hang out anyway so I guess it's okay. I decided to just go back to my usual spot in the gym locker room. "Well. . . .bye." Kendall's friends didn't even give me a look. They just kept talking about Erica's party tomorrow night. I wonder if I'm invited. Probably not. Most likely not.

The locker room was quiet because everyone was doing pull ups by the gymnastics equipment. I pulled my knees up to my chest and sat there, thinking. Why was Kendall acting this way towards me? I should just apologize for everything. I'm going to. I got up and made my way back to his table. I didn't even bother saying excuse me.

"Kendall?" I said. He finished his sentence about his favorite pudding and looked at me. "I'm sorry Kendall. I really am. I'm so sorry, for everything." He still just looked at me. "I know you probably hate me for this and I don't blame you. I wake up every morning feeling so guilty for everything that I don't even want to live anymore. I just can't take it anymore. I need you to say something to me! Please just talk to me again." I stopped talking and waited for him to do something. He looked at me, concerned, but he still didn't do anything. I wiped tears away from my eyes, not caring who sees. Kendall looked at the people around him and then avoided eye contact with me. Carlos got up and came over to me. He put his hand on my shoulder and sighed. And then he pulled my shorts down for everyone to see. The entire cafeteria erupted in monstrous laughter, and I felt my cheeks turn red. I grabbed my shorts and pulled them up, and ran out of the cafeteria. I bumped into a teacher monitoring the halls and he yelled at me, but I didn't stop running until I tripped over my shoelace and fell down the stairs. I just laid there on the floor, choking on my tears.

The bell rang and people started pouring into the halls but no one stopped to even see if I was okay. They just stepped over me and yelled at me for being in the way. But I didn't get up. I just didn't have the will to. I don't care about anything anymore. Eventually the crowd passed and I was alone again. And I fell asleep.

(Later)

Something soothing was pulling me out of the unconsciousness. It was like a massage. It brought me back to kindergarten when the teacher would pat us on the back to wake us up from nap time. But this was more gentle. And I didn't want to wake up. But my eyes managed to open. I was still on the floor at the bottom of the stairs. And it was Kendall who was rubbing my back. I looked up at him and he smiled that warm smile at me. It's like I could hear the birds outside chirping their wondrous song just for me. He continued to rub my back, so I thought I'd try again.

"I'm really sorry Kendall," I said softly. He just shushed me. My ears are craving the sweet sound of his voice directed at me. "Please say something to me. Even if you're mad at me and want me to die, just say it so I can hear you." He stopped rubbing my back and I sat upright and waited for him to do something. He looked at his hands and then looked me in the eyes.

"I don't want you to die," he said.

"Then why have you been ignoring me?" I asked. He looked at his hands again.

"I just don't know what else to do, I guess," he said.

"Are you mad at me?" I asked. He shook his head.

"It's just- I don't even know how to explain it," he said.

"Try," I said. He stood up and I followed his actions. I just stared at him waiting for him to say something else but he didn't. "Please try Kendall."

"I just don't know how to deal with it," Kendall said.

"I know what you mean," I said. "I'm so sorry my mother put you through what she did."

"I thought if I just ignore it and distance myself for a while it would go away eventually, but it didn't," he said.

"I'm sorry," I said.

"I have nightmares," he said.

"I'm really sorry," I said.

"My mother wants to press charges," he said. I just nodded.

"I understand," I said. My smiles were all gone now.

"Yeah," he said.

"Does that mean we can't be friends anymore?" I asked.

"No. We can be friends, only on one condition though," he said. I nodded my head eagerly. "You have to tell someone about this."

"About what?" I asked.

"About what's going on. You really need help Logan," he said.

"No I don't anymore. My parents are much nicer to me now," he wasn't buying it.

"Really?" he asked. "After all this, all of a sudden they're nice?"

"Yep," I said. "They even are letting me live alone now."

"Logan,"

"It's true! I live all alone, and it's great. They don't bother me anymore, or hurt me, and I just have the house to myself. I said.

"Logan, you don't have to be afraid to tell someone. I'll be right there with you," he said.

"Really?" I asked.

"Really," he said. "I will help you."

"But Kendall, you need help too," I said.

"That's why I'm helping you," he said.

"We can help each other?" I asked.

"Yep," he said.

"So does this mean you're done ignoring me?" I asked.

"Yes," he said. "We're in this together."

My heart fluttered. And I couldn't hide the smile as I hugged him tight. And the feeling of him hugging back is all I needed to know he meant it.

**Sorry for any errors I didn't catch. I wrote this up with 14% left lol. Review and tell me how you feel about Kendall. Told you guys you have nothing to worry about! Do you believe him? How do you think he'll react to Logan's parents abandoning him? Also, what do you guys think of Melissa? Any vibes? :)**


	15. Bread and Jealousy

**A/N: Kendall :)**

**Disclaimer: Don't Own Them**

I sat out on my stairs later that night and did some thinking. Kendall actually talked to me today. I still get a weird vibe from him when we talk, but at least it's something. I love hearing his voice. He's going to a party tomorrow night and I don't think I can go, but he said he'll spend the day with me before he goes.

I'm eager to get to bed but I can't get my butt to leave the porch. The night sky is fascinating tonight. For one thing, it's clear. There hasn't been a dry night in about 2 weeks. For another thing, the stars are mesmerizing. I never knew there were constellations that could be seen from my front porch. I never had the chance to actually sit outside before either. I can hear crickets chirping and I got a few nibbles from a mosquito that wouldn't die but it was still a peaceful night. And it was good to actually not feel depressed for once. If only I could get some food.

I remember there being a place that gives out free loaves of bread to people who don't have any food. I don't know if it's there anymore though so I decided to take a walk to see. The neighborhood is so different at night. I saw someone walking a small dog. I saw someone taking out the garbage. And I walked by a group of kids playing kickball in the street. It's weird that those things happen when the sun goes down. I guess people just like it better. I don't know.

I found the place that gives out the bread but they're closed now. A sign on the window read that they open at 9am on Saturdays so I'll make sure to be up early. I hope they give me some. I'll take anything. Even if it's stale.

I started to walk home but I think I took a turn down the wrong street because I have no idea where I am now. There aren't many streetlights lit either. I started to walk a little faster. Something came out of the bushes near the house I was in front of and I took off running. It might have just been a rat but I don't care. I stopped running once I got to a 3-way intersection.

"Which way?" I asked myself quietly. I looked down both sides that I didn't come from and decided to go right. It had more streetlights. I slowed down my walking now that I can kind of see. The houses all look the same on this street. They're all different colors, but they're designed similarly. Nice houses. I heard someone yelling in the distance.

"Alright mother! Chill out, I'm going!" I stopped walking and hid behind a van. The girl kept trash-talking her mother. "Ughhhh! What I would give to trade places with _anyone_! Some people don't know how lucky they have it!" She threw the garbage bag on the sidewalk and went back inside. How sad. Must be so hard to have to bring the garbage out once a week. I shouldn't judge though. I don't know what she's going through. I kept on walking and stopped in front of the girl's house. I can kinda see up the steps through a window. The girl is arguing with somebody.

"Melissa," I said quietly. I thought I recognized that whiny voice! And it must be whiny if I'm saying it. But that must mean Kendall is nearby. I opened the gate and closed it behind me, and walked up the steps to the front door. _What am I doing exactly?_ I thought as I stared at the door. I have no idea. I turned to go back down the stairs and continue finding my way home but something startled me.

"Logan?" A voice asked.

"Yes?" I said back, not turning around, fearing for what was gonna happen. "I'm sorry for trespassing!"

"It's okay Loges no big deal. What are you doing here?" the voice asked.

"Kendall," I said, smiling. I returned to the porch and saw him sitting on a swing chair off to the right.

"Hi," he said, smiling.

"Hello," I replied. There was the awkwardness again, but at least we're talking. That's something.

"What are you doing here?" he asked me again.

"Trying to find my way home," I said. He laughed. I did too.

"It would be that way," he pointed out. In the opposite direction I was going, of course.

"Oh, okay. Thanks," I said. Awkwardness again. "So. . . .what are you doing out here?"

"Avoiding the yelling," he said, thumbing towards the house. I nodded. My mother really has affected him. "It's pretty late. I can ask Melissa to give you a ride home if you want."

"No. That's okay. I can go myself," I said.

"Are you sure? You already got lost once," he laughed again. I did too.

"Will you be there in the car too? Or will it be just her and I?" I asked. I tried not to sound too obvious but I failed.

"Just you and her I guess. I'll use that as my ticket to take a shower without any interruptions," he said. I thought for a minute.

"What kind of interruptions?" I asked.

"I'll go get Melissa," he said going inside. He completely dodged that question which really got me wondering what he meant. I looked through the little windows on the door as he went inside. Gosh, why does he have to be so cute? The way he walks when he thinks no one's looking. Maybe he does know I'm looking. I stepped away from the door. A few moments later Kendall returned with Melissa. She looked very irritated.

"Let's get this over with," she said, slamming her front door and walking down the stairs. I said bye to Kendall and gave him a hug, which he accepted and returned, and went with Melissa. She made me sit in the backseat though. Whatever, at least I don't have to walk.

"So why did you come all the way to my house?" she asked me.

"It was by accident," I said.

"Really? By accident," she repeated. She was totally mocking me. I can tell.

"Yeah, I'm sorry," I said. There was a moment of silence.

"So why'd you come to my house 'by accident'?" she asked. I'm beginning to get a really uncomfortable feeling.

"I was just looking for something," I said.

"I bet you were," she said. I looked out the window to distract myself. "Some_thing_? Or Some_one_?" she added. I looked at her.

"Something," I said. "But I found it, kind of. I'll have it tomorrow," I said. I did NOT want to tell her what I was looking for. She would totally make fun of me.

"I bet you will," she said. We rode in silence again until I noticed she passed by my street.

"Um, my house is that way," I pointed out.

"Let me ask you this Logan: what were you _really_ doing on my front porch tonight?" she was sounding extremely condescending and it reminded me of my mother.

"I was talking with Kendall for a minute," I said.

"About what?" she asked.

"I don't even remember actually. It wasn't much. I think he just asked the same thing you did," I said. This made her smile.

"Good," she said.

"Good?" I asked.

"Yep. That's my boy," she said. I noticed we were riding around the block continuously, passing by my street each time.

"I can just get out here if it's too much trouble," I said.

"No I'll bring you," she said. "I wanna make sure we're clear on things." I shuddered at how much she resembled my mother.

"Yes, ma'am," I said out of habit.

"Ooh, 'ma'am', I like that," she said. She pulled up to my house but I couldn't get out because I couldn't unlock the door. She turned around to face me. "You listen to me alright? You stay away from him." I was totally confused.

"Uhhh," I managed to get out.

"Stay away from him," she repeated.

"Kendall?" I asked.

"Yes, Kendall. Who else would I be talking about?" she snapped.

"I'm not allowed to talk to him?" I asked.

"You're not allowed to do anything to him, we clear?" she asked me.

"You're not the boss of me," I said. I tried opening the door again and failed, again.

"No, I'm not. You're right. But if you don't listen to me, I will make your life a living hell," she said.

"You can't do that. It's already been done," I said. She hopped over the front seat of the car and sat right next to me. I flinched at her speed.

"I better not catch you near him, ever," she said to me. She gripped the collar of my shirt and yelled in my face, gritting her teeth. I squeezed my eyes shut tight and nodded my head in agreeance.

"But why?" I asked.

"Because he's mine," she said simply.

"That seems pretty childish," I stated. "You don't own him."

"Yeah, I pretty much do. After all, he isn't living at your house, is he?" she asked. "Or should I say, he isn't living there, _anymore_."

"What if Kendall tries to talk to me? What do I do then?" I asked.

"Oh he won't. He doesn't even like you anyway," she said.

"That's a lie," I said. "Why did he talk to me tonight then?"

"Jesus, Logan isn't it obvious?" she asked. I nodded my head 'no' slowly. "He pities you. He doesn't care about you. He's just doing it so he doesn't feel guilty anymore."

"That's not true," I said softly.

"Believe what you want, Logan. But I know the truth. I do live with him after all. He tells me EVERYTHING about you. About how you annoy the shit out of him daily."

"That's not true!" I yelled.

"Yes it is," she sang. "He told me just this afternoon how he regretted making up with you because now he'll never get rid of you."

"I won't believe you!" I yelled.

"Well, you'll find out on your own then. Ask him," she suggested.

"I will," I said.

"Okay, and you'll find out what will happen to you for talking to him when you do," she said.

"What's the matter with you?" I asked her. "You just told me to ask him! Why are you so confusing?"

"I don't want you near Kendall. That's all," she said. Her tone was softer.

"For how long?" I asked.

"Until I say so," she said.

"I don't know why you're so jealous that Kendall wants to be my friend," I said. "He can be both of our friends you know."

"That's not good enough," she said.

"But your other friends are friends with him. Are you gonna threaten them too?" I asked.

"That's different Logan," she said. "They don't have a huge crush on him." I looked at her and then squinted my eyes.

"Are you the one who wrote that on my locker?" I asked. She shrugged her shoulders.

"I dunno," she said smugly. "I do a lot of things to a lot of lockers." If that doesn't confirm it, I don't know what will.

"You don't have to worry about me "stealing" Kendall away from you," I said, using air quotes.

"Oh, I know that," she said. "Because Kendall's a normal and you're well, you." She scoffed. She's just lucky I plan on keeping Kendall's secret. "So, get whatever plan you have out of your head and get out of my car. I need to disinfect it now." I pulled at the door handle and it still didn't open. She hopped back up front and unlocked it. I got out and slammed the door behind me, not caring.

When I unlocked my front door I turned to look at her one last time and I saw her wink at me as she drove off. I sat in my father's chair and tried to erase everything that Melissa told me, from my mind. Was she really that jealous of me? Cool! I laughed quietly to myself. I know she isn't telling the truth. Kendall would have told me. I sunk down in the chair and sighed, my body finally relaxing.

"At least I get bread tomorrow," I said quietly to myself. And then I was asleep.

**There's another one following this shortly. Will be up later tonight or tomorrow! :)**

**(Again, sorry for any errors)**


	16. My Best Friend Kendall

**A/N: This was supposed to be attached to "Bread and Jealousy" but it was too long and too different a major scene change so you get 2 in one day! :D**

**Disclaimer: Do I have to keep saying it? Lol**

Good thing I'm getting bread this morning because I'm starving! I honestly don't know how I made it this far. I pulled on a different shirt and went outside. Mrs. Knight was watering her lawn. She didn't even acknowledge me. That hurt a little bit. Maybe she just didn't see me. I tried to remember the way to the bread place without heading towards Melissa's house by mistake. I thought I was a little early but when I got there, there were already tons of people there. At least the attention won't only be on me.

A guy gave me a bag and told me to "fill 'er up" inside. It was a big open room, about the size of the school gym, with lots of tables with different things. I went right for the bread table. There were so many different kinds of bread I didn't know which one to choose. And some were still warm. I decided on one that had cheese baked into it. It smelled sweet, yet buttery at the same time, and it took every ounce of my will to not eat it all right there in front of everybody. I walked away from the table but a woman called me back.

"That's not all you're taking right hun?" she asked me. I turned around and looked at her.

"Yes, ma'am," I said. I held onto it as if it were worth a thousand dollars.

"There's plenty here for ya hun, take more, please!" She took my bag from me and put three more loaves of the cheesy bread into it. She handed my bag back to me and I looked in it.

"Thank you so much," I said solemnly.

"No problem hun, go around all the other ones and take as much as you need," she coaxed.

"No, no this is more than enough. I'd rather someone else who needs it have it," I said.

"Darlin' if you're here in the first place, you need it," she turned me around and ushered me to the other tables. I felt greedy, but if she insisted I guess it's okay. I made my way over to another table that had all sorts of canned goods. I grabbed a few cans of cranberry sauce because they were the only ones with a flip top on them. I don't know if I have a can opener. I moved on to another table that had all types of sweets on them. I had my eyes glued to this one cheesecake that looked too good. It was a little one. Made for one person. Like me. I reached out for it.

"Ugh what are you doing here?" I looked up to see Melissa standing behind the sweets table. I put the cheesecake down.

"Um, nothing," I said. She looked at me weird.

"You're doing nothing at a food bank with a bag in your hand?" she asked me. If it was so obvious why did she even ask?

"Well, why are you here?" I asked her.

"I volunteer here on the weekends, if you really need to know," she said. She looked at her phone and made weird faces. She was obviously uninterested in being here. As I was to see her.

"Can I have this cheesecake?" I asked. Even though I know I don't need her permission.

"Sure," she said. She picked up the container and dropped it on the ground. "Whoops, silly me." She picked up the crumbled cheesecake and put it in my bag. How can she be so fine wasting food like that? I'll still eat it though. Like I always say. You never know when your last meal will be. And I'm lucky enough to have remembered about this place.

"Thank you," I said. She gave me a look which I ignored. I went to a table far on the opposite side of the room. There were multiple jars of baby food. I know I should be saving those for the babies, but I'm not taking anything else here so I stocked up on the pureed fruits and veggies. At least I don't need heat, water, or electricity to eat these. I made sure to leave a bunch though. I wouldn't want to be taking something away from a really hungry baby.

My bag is filled with all sorts of food and I am very happy. I feel slightly guilty about the baby food, but I promised myself to donate food to the food bank once I know I'm able to do so. I walked home, the right way, and unloaded all of my goods onto the counter. I think I'm mostly excited about the bread though. I break off a piece and pop it into my mouth. It tastes better than it smells and I end up choking on my own drool. I ripped off another piece before I wrapped it up and put it in the cabinet.

"Out of sight, out of mind," I said.

(Later)

Okay that's totally not true because all I can think of is that bread. I tried to get my mind off of it by doing everything I can think of. I picked grass outside in my backyard by the cherry tree, I threw acorns at a bee's hive, and I even picked out the hairs on my chest, one by one. Not like there was that many to begin with. I decided it was late enough for me to have lunch so I ripped off a huge piece of bread and ate it with baby peaches. Probably one of the best lunches I've had in a while. It was so good I almost didn't hear the doorbell ring. I choked on the bread when I opened the door and saw Kendall.

"Kendall, what are you doing here?" I asked trying not to act like I was choking, even though I clearly was.

"I was just stopping by to make sure you're alright," he said. My heart fluttered.

"You were?" I asked.

"Yeah. Melissa said she saw you at the food bank today. Are you okay here?" he asked. Oh my God. Kendall is worried about me. Take that Melissa.

"Yeah I'm good," I lied.

"Are you sure?" he asked me.

"Yep," I said. "I was, working there. Volunteering. Donating actually." He just nodded his head.

"If you ever need any help just tell me okay?" he said.

"Okay Kendall," I smiled.

"Alright. I'm gonna go before your folks get back," he said.

"Oh, you can stay for a while," I said. "My parents won't be here for a long time."

"I'd really rather not take my chances Logan, sorry," he said. I really do understand why he wants to leave so quickly, and I'm so flattered that he would even come over for this long knowing what he's been through. I just wish he'd come in and sit for a minute or two. I can't get mad at him if he won't though.

"No Kendall," I grabbed onto his arm as he was walking away. "Please stay. They're not here I promise. They're never coming back. Please stay I just want company. I'm so lonely Kendall. Please don't go!" He stopped pulling his arm.

"Where are they?" he asked.

"I don't know. They left the day you did," I said.

"You've been alone this whole time?" he asked me. Well, he kinda yelled it.

"Yeah," I said.

"I thought I told you to tell me if you ever need help," he said.

"I didn't think I needed help. I'm just so lonely. Please stay. We can stay outside if you want," I said. He didn't say anything. "I also didn't want to bother you."

"You wouldn't bother me," he said. I shrugged.

"You've just done so much for me already. And we only just started talking again. I don't like being needy," I admitted.

"Logan, you personally would never bother me. Your parents would, but not you," he smiled but I didn't. His smile faded when he saw I wasn't smiling back.

"I just don't want to make you hate me Kendall. I don't think I'd be able to handle that. I don't need help. I'm managing. I just want company," I said. He looked at his phone.

"You swear they're not coming back anytime soon?" he asked.

"I would never say they weren't if they were. I would never do that to you," I said. He sighed.

"Alright," he said. "I'll stay for a little bit." I jumped up and down in happiness and he laughed.

"We can stay outside if you want to," I said.

"I'd rather go over to my yard, if you don't mind," he said.

"Like across the street?" I asked. He nodded his head. "Okay." We walked across the street and sat in his backyard. We talked about how both of us have been dealing with everything that's happened lately, and he asked me how I was living with no one to care for me. Mrs. Knight came outside and gave Kendall a hug and sat and talked with us for a while. She kept asking me if I was okay and I kept telling her yes. I know she doesn't believe me though. Still, I love knowing she still cares about me.

"I really would like it if you stayed here tonight sweetie, it's not safe over there," she said to me.

"But it is now," I said. "My parents aren't there anymore. I promise it's okay now." Kendall and Mrs. Knight went inside to talk about something they wouldn't tell me and left me outside for a minute. I am really enjoying their company right now. It makes me feel not so insane. Mrs. Knight called me into the house.

"Alright honey, you're gonna stay here from now on okay? I'll go over with you to get your things, but I absolutely do not want you staying there anymore," she said.

"What did Kendall tell you?" I asked. She shook her head.

"This is not up for discussion Logan. You're staying here," her voice was stern and I got scared for a minute.

"Yes ma'am," I said. She looked upset. "I'm sorry!" I covered my mouth with my hand.

"Let's go," she said, taking my hand.

"No you don't have to go," I said. I did not want her seeing how unkempt my house was. "I can go and come right back," I said.

"No, I'm coming with you," she said. We walked across the street and went into my house. Kendall came too. They stood in my living room as I went in the kitchen to get my bread and baby food. Mrs. Knight had her hands on Kendall's shoulders and she was rubbing them softly. I could see on his face that he was really uncomfortable being in my house.

"I'm ready," I said, even though all I grabbed was my food.

"You don't need any clothes?" she asked me.

"Oh yeah," I said. I went into the bathroom and shut the door. I didn't know what to do. I don't have any clean clothes left. I don't want to bring smelly clothes into their home. That's rude. Plus, they'll think poorly of me. I exited the bathroom in shame, empty handed. Kendall was gone now. It must have been too much for him. Mrs. Knight gave me a puzzled look. "I don't have anything," I said sadly.

"It's okay baby," she said. "I'll get you anything you need. Do you have everything?" I nodded my head, tightly gripping my bag of food. Do you have a pillow or blanket?" I can tell by her tone of voice that she feels really bad for me. Which I hate. I'd much rather her treat me like a normal person. But I'm not a normal person. A normal person wouldn't be in this situation. I went upstairs and grabbed my pillow and blanket off of my bed and went back downstairs. Mrs. Knight was gone.

"Hello?" I asked out loud.

"Come outside, sweetie," I heard her say. I went outside and saw both my parents' cars in the driveway. My legs felt like jelly and my arms got weak.

"No," I said out loud. I couldn't help myself as my body cowered in fear. Mrs. Knight helped me up and walked me across the street as my mother yelled horrible things at her.

"You stay here okay?" she told me as she opened her front door. I felt Kendall put his hands on my shoulders from behind. He brought me upstairs to his room.

"It's okay," he said repeatedly. I just kept saying 'no, no, no,' over and over. I didn't know what else to say.

"Your mom's not safe," I managed to get out.

"My mom will be fine," he said to me. "I'll stay here with you tonight alright?" he asked me. I nodded my head but it didn't make me feel any better. Why all of a sudden would they show up today? When I told Kendall they weren't coming home any time soon. I looked out of Kendall's bedroom window and saw Mrs. Knight talking with my mother and father. "Everything will be okay Logan. Just come here." I went over to him and sat down on the floor next to him. He wrapped me in a hug and I snuggled into it. It was the first time he hugged me first. "Hey Logan," he said.

"What?" I said, not moving my face away from his chest. He smelled so good.

"I'm going to a party tonight and I'm allowed to bring another person. You wanna go?" he asked me.

"What about Melissa?" I asked.

"What about her?" he asked.

"I just thought you'd bring her over me," I said.

"Well, she's grounded anyway. So do you wanna go?" he asked. I was his second choice? I smiled.

"Okay, I'll go," I said.

"Good," he said.

"But Kendall," I added.

"Yeah,"

"I have no clothes to wear," I said. "They're all dirty."

"We can throw what you're wearing right now in the wash, it'll be done by tonight," he said. I looked at what I was wearing. I guess it was okay to wear at a party. A red shirt and black shorts.

"Hey Kendall," I said again.

"Yeah," he said.

"What am I gonna wear until then?" I asked.

"I'm sure I have something you could throw on for now," he mentioned. I nodded.

"Hey Kendall," I said, again.

"Yeah," he said.

"Thanks." He hugged me tighter and I snuggled closer.

"Like I said before: You're always safe with me."


	17. Hi, I'm Awkward and Lost

**A/N: I forgot to leave a note at the end of the last chapter lol. I wanted to say **_**"What do you think Mrs. Knight is saying to Logan's parents? How are they reacting?"**_** But I guess you'll find out now anyways :)**

***Warning* Contains violence and sad Logie. Rated M-ish**

**Disclaimer: Don't own them**

"What do you think your mom is saying to them?" I asked Kendall.

"Who knows," he said to me. We were still on the floor, my face in his chest. I just couldn't find the courage in me to check the window again. "I wouldn't worry though. She's handled every other parent in this neighborhood. She knows what she's doing."

"But are the other parents in the neighborhood as bad as mine?" I asked.

"No," he said. "No, they're not. But my mom wouldn't go out if she thought she couldn't handle herself." I sat upright and he took his hand off of my back. I can tell he was uncomfortable where he was sitting because his back was pressed against his bed post. Still, he tried to comfort me. "You okay?"

"I think so," I replied. We can hear yelling outside. That's definitely my mother. We both stood up and fought for the window and stared at awkward angles. It's just my father and Mrs. Knight outside. I sighed. "Well, that kinda makes me feel better." I stepped away from the window.

"Your dad doesn't seem as bad as your mom," Kendall said.

"He isn't. He just won't stand up for himself," I explained.

"Or you," he said.

"Yeah, I guess." I looked out the window again. "I think they're just talking normally. Your mom seems a little at ease now."

"Here, give me your shirt. You can wear this for now." He held out a sweater for me. "I can take your shorts too if you want." I debated. I kinda felt awkward stripping in front of him. Well, more like judged.

"Uhh," I stammered. He laughed.

"I'll leave." He left his room and shut the door behind him. I quickly changed my shirt but I realized he didn't give me any bottoms to change into.

"Um Kendall?" I asked through a crack in the door.

"Yeah?" he said.

"What do I change into for pants?" I asked.

"Well, do you have anything on underneath?" he asked me.

"Yeah, but," I didn't know what to say. I didn't want him seeing what I do to myself.

"Logan, I'm sure no one here would mind if you just bummed around in your underclothes for a while. I do it all the time," he laughed.

"Yeah well, you live here," I said under my breath. I pulled off my shorts and pulled the sweater down to try to hide the scratches on my thighs. I think it's good enough. "Alright you can come back in now." He reentered his room and took my shorts.

"See? It's no big deal. It'll only be for like an hour and a half anyway." He left the room. I patted my thighs, making beats with no rhythm whatsoever. He poked his head back in the room. "You can come with me Logan. I'm not coming back up here." I followed him down the stairs. We went through the kitchen and he opened a door and went down some more stairs and I started to follow him. "Keep that door open please," he said looking back at me.

"I'll just wait up here," I said. I held the door open for him while he was down there. Two of his sisters kept staring at me from the kitchen table. I smiled at them but they just giggled and whispered things to each other, and then ran away. I heard a couple of beeping noises and then heard the washing machine start to run, followed by his fast-paced footsteps. He's even afraid of his own basement. He closed the door tightly behind him and locked it. The lock looked like it was newly put there. It didn't really match the door.

"I'm gonna go check with my mom," Kendall said. He went to the front door and opened it. There were police cruisers outside. I saw the flashing lights and knew it was police before I even got to the door. "Stay inside, you're practically naked." He shoved me back in and closed the door. I saw him through the window. He's so cute when he looks both ways before crossing. He kept his distance with my dad. Those two sisters reappeared in the living room giggling and pointing at me, and then they ran upstairs and slammed the door behind them. I sat on the couch, embarrassed.

"Why do people always do that to me?" I asked no one quietly. I was so upset with my thoughts that I didn't even notice another girl come into the living room.

"Hi," she said to me.

"Hello," I said, coming out of my thoughts.

"You're one of Kendall's friends?" she asked me. I nodded my head. She was slightly older than the other two girls, maybe by a year or two. But she wasn't laughing at me at least. She sat on the sofa in front of me and stared at me. That made me very uncomfortable so I started tapping my thighs again.

"Why are you in your underwear?" she asked. I had totally forgotten about that.

"I uh, needed to wash my clothes. They got dirty and I need to wear them out tonight," I replied. She nodded her head.

"What's your name?" she asked.

"Logan," I said. I waited for her to start gagging or crying but it didn't happen. Instead she just nodded her head.

"Hi Logan," she said. She turned the TV on and lied down on the sofa.

"Hi," I said softly. I wasn't used to this kind of conversation when it wasn't Blenny, or Kendall, or Mrs. Knight. Speaking of Kendall, he's taking a really long time. I wonder what's going on out there. I stood up and looked out the window. The flashing lights on the cop car turned off but the car was still there. An officer was talking to my dad and Mrs. Knight, and Kendall was nodding his head a lot. I really want to go down and get my pants and go over there but then again, I'm scared. What if they take me to jail for breaking my mom's secret? She told me they would if I ever told anybody about this and I believed her for a while but then I stopped. What if she really was telling the truth the whole time? I decided to stay safe in here instead of finding out.

"My brother really likes you Logan," the girl said to me. This caught me off guard.

"Really?" I asked. She nodded her head whilst still looking at the TV.

"Yep," she said. "He talks about you a lot."

"Really?" I asked again.

"Yep. At the dinner table," she said. My heart warmed with glorified armor.

"He talks about me at dinner?" I asked.

"Yep." She was watching a show about a person answering school questions to win money. There was a moment of silence before I braved the next question.

"So. . . .What does he say about me?"

"Different things," she said vaguely.

"Oh," I replied. Another awkward silence. I fidgeted with my hands and pulled Kendall's sweater down over my knees. The person on TV just won $175,000. "Different things like what?"

"Like how he thinks you're really brave, aaaaaaaaaaaand, how he loves that you trust him, aaaaaaaaaand how he wants you to teach him school stuff but he's scared to ask you," she said. I couldn't believe it.

"Kendall really thinks that way about me?" I asked.

"Yep." She got up and stood on the sofa I was on and checked the window behind me. "And can you keep a secret?"

"Of course," I said. She came closer to me and whispered in my ear.

"He thinks you're cute." She covered her mouth with her hands and looked me in the eyes, then ran upstairs. I didn't need anything else anymore. I didn't care who saw. I opened the front door and left it open as I graciously walked across the street.

"Logan, what are you doing out here?" Kendall asked me. I ignored his question and almost choked on my heartbeat. I went right up to him and hugged him so tight I thought my arms were gonna fall off. He hugged me back, and I felt Mrs. Knight rub my shoulder.

"Honey, you're gonna catch a cold out here like that," Mrs. Knight told me.

"You really should put on some longer pants," my father said, laughing.

"You're laughing?" I asked. "Everything is fine?"

"You're fine Logan," Kendall said. I looked around and Mrs. Knight, Kendall, my dad, and the officer were all smiles.

"I'm confused," I said. "Why do you guys look like that?"

"We just don't want you to be afraid," my dad said.

"Afraid of what?" I questioned. It's as if at that very moment two beefy officers came out carrying my mother by her arms and legs. She was kicking and screaming inhumane things at my direction. She was even spitting at me. The only words I understood were 'you ruined me' and 'I'll get you.' I hid behind my dad. Not like he'd ever protect me from her. I should have hid behind Kendall. He likes me. More than I thought. A smaller officer left my house with my mother's purse in his hands. "So. . . .is mom going away forever?"

"For now," he said. I'm still lost. Why weren't they taking my father too? He's just as guilty as she is. He didn't even try to help me. Well. . . .He did leave a note saying the basement door would be unlocked. Still. . . .see? This is why I don't like my father sometimes. He's too confusing.

"So, you're staying here?" I asked him.

"Yep," he said. This did not make sense.

"So, do I have to go home then?" I asked Mrs. Knight.

"No, I still want you with me," she said.

"And that's fine with me," my dad said. Of course it is. Why would he want me? I don't think he's ever wanted me. Except for that one Sunday.

"So. . . .Everyone is fine with me just staying with the Knights instead?" I asked.

"Yeah, pretty much," everyone said.

"But why?" I asked.

"Well," the officer started. "We at the office determined that although your father didn't come to us in the first place when he should have, he didn't directly put you in any harm."

"But he kinda did," Kendall said. I nodded my head in agreeance.

"Has your father ever hurt you Logan?" the officer asked me.

"No. Well, not physically that is," I said. "Only when I would hear him in the other room when my mother was hurting me and he wouldn't do anything. Or when he knew Kendall was in the basement and wouldn't tell me."

"Well, then there it is," the officer said. He walked over to the car with the other officers.

"But he's an accomplice!" I yelled. "What kind of officer is he?" I asked.

"Relax," Mrs. Knight said.

"Logan, I had no knowledge of Kendall being in our basement at all," he said. "Not until you were down there."

"Then why didn't you come help us?" I asked.

"I left the door open didn't I?" he said. I was still lost. I sat down on the curb of the sidewalk.

"I still don't get it," I said.

"I think we're done here if you don't mind," one of the officers said. Mrs. Knight and my dad waved them off and they left. My mother gave me the scariest look I've ever seen in my life. I don't even want to talk about it.

"Logan, if I can muster up enough trust to believe your dad had nothing to do with it, you should believe him too," Kendall said. Still lost.

"So you forgave him?" I asked. He nodded his head.

"But then dad, why did you say you were sworn to secrecy when I asked you where Kendall was? You acted like you knew," I said.

"I had no knowledge. All I knew was that your mother told me she did something to him to punish you. She threatened me Logan. If I said anything who knows what she would have done?" he said. "I figured it's best to act like I had no knowledge. I did it to protect both of you. If I didn't say a word, she would leave him unharmed. That's what she told me."

"You're a coward!" I spit out.

"I didn't want you to get hurt," he said.

"You're a liar. She always hurt me! And you did nothing about it!" I couldn't control my anger. Kendall tried to calm me down by walking me across the street. He sat me on his front porch and told me to catch my breath. Mrs. Knight stayed and talked with my father. How can everyone just accept his apology so easily?

"Why are you guys okay with my dad? It doesn't make any sense to me," I said.

"Logan, I really think your dad is telling the truth. I don't think he meant to hurt us at all," he said.

"I can't believe you're defending him," I snarled.

"Listen to me Logan," he said. "You know I would never defend that bitch of a woman that is your mom. But I really think your dad is telling the truth."

"I just don't know," I told him. "I'm afraid to get close to him again. I don't want him to abandon me again."

"He won't Logan. You can trust me, right?" he asked. I thought about what his sister told me earlier. He wouldn't lie to someone he thought was cute, right?

"Okay Kendall. I trust you," I said. We went back across the street with Mrs. Knight and my dad.

"Can I stay with Mrs. Knight dad?" I asked.

"That's where I want you. You're safer there, and I know she'll take better care of you than I would," he said.

"Your dad is going to get some help," Mrs. Knight told me.

"What kind of help?" I asked.

"Some assistance that will maybe help me learn how to deal with this and raise you better. Until then I want you here though," he said. He got in his car and started it up, pulled out of the driveway and left, waving to us as he turned down the street. And I'm still lost.

"I bet your clothes are done Logan. How about we head to that party?" Kendall asked me. "Mom can you drive us?"

"Sure, but we have to take the girls. Dad won't be home till later tonight," she said. Kendall sighed but agreed. We all went back inside and I saw that the woman on TV who had won $175,000 had lost most of her money and now only had $25,000. Mrs. Knight went downstairs to the basement while Kendall got the girls in the car. The older girl squinted her eyes and smiled at me as she walked down the stairs. I did the same to her.

"They're dry already?" I asked Mrs. Knight, who handed me my clothes.

"Yeah, they were in the dryer," she said. Someone must have switched them over. I went upstairs to Kendall's room and changed my clothes. I pulled my shorts on and they felt warm. I pulled Kendall's sweater over my head and fumbled with my red shirt.

"Nice and snug," I said to myself. I made sure the bandages were still covering the tree I drew on my arm. They were. I joined the rest in the van and buckled up.

"Everyone ready to go?" Mrs. Knight asked. We all said yes and she started for Erica's house. Kendall's sister, the one that likes me, grabbed my hand and held it.

"How do you know he thinks I'm cute?" I whispered to her.

"He told me. He tells me a lot of secrets because I keep them. Most of the time," she whispered back. I nodded my head. "And he wrote it in his journal." Kendall keeps a journal? And he wrote about me in it? My cheeks started to get hot and I started to sweat.

"Her house is up this hill," Kendall said.

"I know where to go silly," Mrs. Knight said. She pulled into a driveway and parked. "Do you have your phone on you?"

"Yes mom," Kendall said.

"What about you?" She asked me.

"Uhh, I don't have a phone," I said.

"Well, just stay with Kendall, alright sweetie?" she advised.

"Yep," I said. Kendall and I got out and walked up the stairs to Erica's house. Kendall rang the bell.

"I'm nervous," I said.

"Why?" Kendall asked me.

"I've never been to a party before," I said.

"Don't worry. You'll be fine. Just stick with me," he said. There's that heartbeat again. No one answered the door so Kendall opened the door and we went right in. Loud music was blaring and there was barely any room to walk around. It was hard to keep up with Kendall. I eventually lost him.

"Kendall?" I said. I bumped into a bunch of guys I've never seen before and they called me a klutz and pushed me away. "Sorry." There are way too many people here. I stopped walking when I got to a living room and found a spot to lean against a wall. It's too hot in here. Where is Kendall?

"Um who invited you?" A voice asked me. I turned to see Erica with James nearby.

"I'm here with-"

"It doesn't matter. You don't belong here," she told me. I felt kind of hurt. Even though I half-expected it.

"Too bad. I'm not leaving," I said.

"James, he's being rude to me. Make him leave," Erica said. James went to come after me but I dodged him and ran in the other room. I stopped running when I heard everybody yelling Kendall's name. Everybody likes him. He's so lucky. I tried to find where his name was coming from. Sounds like the kitchen. I made my way into there and sat on a stool. Three people that were near me got up and walked away. I took a cup and filled it with punch. At least the punch tastes pretty good. It tastes kind of like lemon-lime soda mixed with fruit punch and marshmallows. I refilled my glass. Some spilled a little on my shirt. At least my shirt is red. I'm sure once the droplets dry it won't be noticeable. Some guy came over to me and pulled the stool from under me and I fell onto the floor.

"This is my chair!" He yelled in my face. I must have had a sad face because he high-fived another guy and walked away laughing. I need to find Kendall. I don't like this party. I'd rather just go home. Someone turned the music down.

"Hey everyone, Erica wants all guests outside in back," some girl said. The people in the kitchen didn't budge until some guys from the hockey team; one of them was the one who took my chair, screamed at everyone telling them to get out. I followed some people out onto Erica's patio and looked for Kendall in the large crowd of people. I found him standing on the opposite side of the circle everyone made. I think he's looking for me. I went to go over there but somebody grabbed me by the shoulders.

"Alright everyone, listen up!" Erica said. I noticed it was James who was holding my shoulders. I tried to get away but his grip was too strong. "There's an unwanted guest here at this party." James shook me by the shoulders for emphasis. "And he refuses to leave." The people started to boo me. "You all know what that means." I have no clue what that means. And I don't remember either.

I remember a few things that night though. I remember James' hands on my shoulders. I remember him lifting me up and slamming me on the ground; I don't remember how many times though. I remember Kendall yelling and screaming and pushing James off of me. I remember the sound of a gunshot. I remember faint flashing lights. Then nothing.

**:O How was this one? Where did the gunshot come from? Who got hurt? :O :O :O**


	18. Who Pulled the Trigger?

**A/N: Yeah. . . .Shocker with that last one, I know. No one guessed right though in terms of who got shot. You'll find out now :) Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Don't own them**

The sounds of faint beeping awoke me from a wondrous slumber. I don't think I've slept that well in a while actually. It felt good to be well rested. I shifted my position slightly and felt a shooting pain run up my left leg. I winced in discomfort.

"Take it easy," I heard somebody say. I couldn't open my eyes though. It was like some really strong force was keeping them closed. They felt glued shut tight. I mumbled something that I don't even remember and stretched again. I felt something on my leg. It felt like a hand. Rubbing. It kind of made that pain more unbearable and annoying but I can tell whoever it was who was doing it didn't mean it. I tried to pry open my eyes with my fingers by rubbing them in circles and it worked eventually, but my vision was blurry. I squinted slightly and tried to make out the figure sitting next to me.

"Dad," I said softly. He rubbed my forehead softly and tousled my hair.

"What time is it?" I asked.

"A little past 11:30," he said still messing with my hair.

"What happened?" I asked, my voice hoarse.

"You're okay," he said to me. I blinked a few times to make my vision clearer, but it only helped a little bit. I know now that I'm in a hospital. That must explain the beeping.

"I don't remember anything," I said.

"That's okay. You don't need to," he told me.

"Why?" I asked, somewhat shifting again.

"Everyone's okay. You don't have to worry," he said.

"Why do you keep saying that?" I asked. "What happened? Where's Kendall?" I started to panic.

"He's okay. Just sedated," he said.

"Sedated?" I asked.

"He'll be okay though. Don't stress," he said.

"Where is he? What happened?" I started to get up but my left leg prohibited that. Searing pain shot up from my toes to my hip.

"No, no, lie back down," he told me. He arranged my pillows to make me more comfortable.

"I want to see Kendall," I whined.

"You can see him in the morning," he said.

"No I want to see him now," I said.

"Even if you did see him now, he wouldn't be awake. He won't be until at least tomorrow," he said.

"What's wrong with him dad? Please tell me, you're worrying me!" I pleaded.

"Logan you were at a party tonight," my father began.

"Yeah, I kinda remember that," I said, recollecting my thoughts.

"Well, a fight broke out. Do you remember that?" he asked me.

"A fight?" I asked.

"Yes. Between you and some kid James. Does that ring a bell?" he asked.

"I think so," I said. "Oh, no. And then Kendall jumped in," I said remembering. My dad nodded his head.

"And the gunshots?" I asked. He nodded his head again.

"No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no," I said. I just kept repeating it.

"Shh," my dad said. He tried soothing me but it wouldn't work.

"Dad it's all my fault." I said. "They didn't want me there. I should have just left when she told me to."

"It is not your fault," my dad said. "You did not pull that trigger."

"Is Kendall okay dad?" I asked,

"He will be fine," he said. His voice was mild. I know he wanted me to relax but I couldn't. I felt so guilty.

"Who did it?" I asked.

"I'm not sure. No one is I think," he said.

"Oh my God," I said.

"You need to go to bed Logan," he said. "I promise you, I'll take you over to him in the morning." I yawned and rubbed my leg.

"So what's wrong with me?" I asked.

"It's broken in two places," he said.

"I'm in a lot of pain," I stated.

"I'll let the doctor know." He got up and left and I sat back and sighed. That party was terrible. Erica is a terrible host. Who brings a gun to a party? My poor Kendall. I want to see him now! My dad returned and shortly after a doctor stuck something in my arm that made me feel fuzzy all over my body. Then I fell asleep again.

(Later)

I don't remember my dreams last night. I guess that's a good thing. My dreams tend to scare me more than average. I was forced to eat a breakfast of wheat toast and oatmeal but the oatmeal made me want to throw it back up. I wish I had my cheesy bread to settle my stomach.

"Try to eat a little more," my dad said.

"I really don't think I can," I said. I took another bite of oatmeal anyway just to please him. "Can I go see Kendall now?"

"I'll go see if he's awake," he said.

"No, just take me with you," I said.

"Just wait here. Chill out," he said laughing. "You'll see him today, don't worry." He left but I still wasn't satisfied.

"I want to see him now," I said to myself. I removed the blanket off of my legs and patted my left one. It felt a little better today. The doctors put a cast on it. I didn't get to pick the color though so I'm stuck with a boring brown one. My dad returned with a wheelchair.

"Kendall's not up yet, but I brought this with me anyway," he said.

"You got me excited," I said.

"Sorry." We sat there in almost silence, because the little TV was on. I don't know why though. Nobody was watching it.

"So. . . .Is Kendall hurt bad?" I asked.

"He's in quite a bit of pain, but he'll be fine," he said.

"Yeah but, is he hurt bad?" I asked again.

"Loges, stop worrying about him alright?"

"Don't tell me not to worry about him!" I said. "He's my friend. That's like my job."

"Easy Logan," he said. "I'm not saying don't worry about him at all, ever. I just want you to relax. I know he's gonna be fine. I spoke with Kendall's mom while you were asleep."

"And what did she say?" I asked.

"Exactly what I'm telling you. He'll be fine."

(Later)

I'm dying to go see Kendall! My dad left to wherever it was he said he was going. I wasn't paying attention because I had no desire to care. The wheelchair is still in here though. But I don't think it's close enough to limp over to. Still. . . . it is Kendall. I slowly spun my legs over the side of the bed I was on.

"Wheelchair. Come closer. . . .Please?" I motioned for it as if it would actually listen but it didn't sadly. I limped over anyway. It wasn't too hard. I felt better once I was off my leg again. "Okay, now to find Kendall's room." I wheeled out of my room and stopped at a desk.

"Excuse me," I said to the woman.

"What?" she said. Kinda rude.

"Can you tell me where Kendall's room is? Kendall Knight?" I asked. She typed on a computer and told me he was five rooms down to my left. I wheeled myself over and pushed his door open slowly. "Kendall?" he didn't answer. But someone else did.

"Ew, what are you doing here?" Melissa makes me angry almost as much as my mother.

"I'm here for my friend, not for you," I said.

"Whatever," she said. She held his hand and kissed it multiple times. "You know this is all your fault right?"

"Ya," I said. "You weren't even there. How would you know?"

"Because whenever Kendall's around you he gets hurt," she said. That's so true. But this still wasn't my fault.

"I'm not the one who pulled the trigger," I said.

"No, but let's face it Logan. If you weren't there, he'd be awake and happy right now." I looked at Kendall. He looks dead. But he's breathing. I checked to see his chest rising and falling.

"Why do you like making me feel so guilty all the time?" I asked.

"I'm just stating the obvious. It's not my fault it makes you guilty," she said.

"Kendall will never go for someone evil like you," I said. Wow. I just insulted her. Cool!

"Too bad I don't care what you think," she said. Oh well. I tried. "Now can you like, go back to where you came from? I was in the middle of something." She started planting kisses all over Kendall's face and neck, making me uncomfortable.

"That's not cool," I said. She just ignored me. "Hey, get off of him!" I wheeled over to her and hit her leg with one of the wheels.

"You did not just do that," she stated.

"I kinda did," I retorted.

"You'll regret that," she said. She took my chair by the handles and turned me around. "Bye!" She shoved me out of Kendall's room and I went flying. I tried to stop but the wheels burned my palms because I was going too fast.

"Someone help me," I said.

"Whoa whoa," someone said. My father grabbed my chair and steadied me. "You gotta go slower bud. You could really hurt yourself."

"It wasn't on purpose," I said. "I wanted to see Kendall and Melissa pushed me out of his room."

"Who's Melissa?" My father asked me.

"She's a mean girl from school. She doesn't like me," I said.

"Well that's not very nice. Why doesn't she like you?" He asked. He wheeled me out of everyone's way and kneeled down to my level. I couldn't really tell my dad the real reason. He'd probably wheel me down a flight of stairs then laugh.

"I don't know. She just does," I said.

"Well she's got to have a reason. Come on, let's go talk to her."

"No. No dad, please!" I begged.

"It'll be fine. Don't you want closure? Maybe you two can work something out," he said. He started to wheel me over to the door.

"No, dad, dad listen," I said. He stopped wheeling and faced me.

"She's doing inappropriate things to Kendall in there right now," I said quietly.

"Inappropriate like how?" he asked me.

"She's like all over him and kissing him and he's not even awake," I said.

"Well, that's not okay," he said. He got up and opened the door to the room Kendall was in. I wheeled in after him. "Hey, hey. Are you supposed to be doing that?"

"Oh, I'm sorry," Melissa said. She hopped off of Kendall's bed. Her cheeks got really red.

"Are you supposed to be in here?" my dad asked her.

"Yes, sir. Mrs. Knight asked me to watch over him while she ran to the store," Melissa said. She looked so nervous. I loved this.

"Well, I'm sure she wouldn't appreciate you doing that to him," my dad said.

"I'm sorry sir," she said. She sat in a chair and folded her hands in her lap.

"You should be ashamed. Young girls like you shouldn't be acting like that. What if it was Kendall's parents and their daughters walking in instead of me?" he continued.

"I-I don't know. I'm sorry," she said. I'm beginning to feel bad for her. . . .Wait a minute, never mind. No I'm not. This is amazing.

"You're just lucky it was me. I won't tell them about this but you keep your distance from him from now on, you hear?"

"Yes, sir," she said. My dad checked on Kendall, then wheeled me out and back into my room.

"Why were you out of bed in the first place?" he asked me.

"I just really wanted to see Kendall. I'm sorry dad," I said. He helped be back into bed.

"It's alright," he said. "I guess it's kind of a good thing you did, huh?"

"I guess so," I said. There was a knock on the door.

"Hi, we're here to see Logan?" someone said. I couldn't see who it was because the door wasn't open all the way.

"He's right here," my dad said. The door opened all the way and revealed Erica and James. My eyes widened.

"Hi Logan," Erica said sympathetically.

"Hey," I said, not taking my eyes off of James. He's beefy and scary and I don't want him throwing me again.

"I'm sorry," Erica said to my dad. "Would you mind if we talked in private?" I mouthed the word 'no' to my dad but he still agreed to leave stating that he would be right on the other side of the door. "Logan, I am just SO sorry for what happened last night," she said. She sounded sincere, but I don't know.

"But, you told him to do it," I pointed out.

"Yeah, I know. And I'm just really really, sorry," she continued. "I never wanted it to go that far."

"How far did you want it to go?" I asked.

"I don't know. Maybe far enough to just scare you to leave," she said.

"Well, don't worry. I'm scared," I said. "Are you sorry?" I asked James. He shrugged his shoulders.

"I mean, I guess so," he said. "I'm just sorry Kendall got into it. He's my bro, man. I never wanted him to get hurt."

"That's why people shouldn't fight," I said. "Kendall could have died."

"I don't even know who brought the gun," Erica said. "None of my friends have weapons like that."

"I know a few people. But they weren't at the party," James said.

"I thought it was one of you," I said to them. They both shook their heads.

"Oh God no," Erica said.

"Why did you want me to leave so bad?" I asked.

"Well, it's just, Melissa told me some things. And I didn't want to look uncool by having you there," she said. I rolled my eyes.

"What did she say about me?" I asked.

"Just that you, you know," she said. I shook my head.

"No, I don't know," I said.

"That you are, different with things," she said.

"Different with things like what?" I asked. I knew exactly what she meant though.

"Like thinking dudes are hot," James said.

"I don't think all 'dudes' are," I said. "Just one." That last part slipped out though. James took a step away from me. I chewed on my bottom lip awkwardly.

"Who?" Erica asked. I shook my head. "Oh come on. Tell us!"

"I don't even know if we're friends," I said.

"Well, that's why I came here," she said. "I'm really sorry. And I hope we can be friends." She gave me a hug and I kind of returned it but it was awkward because I'm lying down. James held out his hand to me.

"No hard feelings?" he said. I took his hand in mine.

"Sure," I said. "Have you guys visited Kendall yet?"

"Not yet, we came to see you first," Erica said. "But no changing the subject. Who do you like?" Was I really about to tell them?

"You guys gotta swear not to tell anybody," I said. They both agreed. "It's Kendall." They both laughed at me.

"We know that," James said. "I thought you were talking about someone else."

"Me too," Erica said.

"You guys know?" I asked.

"Of course we know," Erica said. "Even Kendall knows."

"He does?" I asked.

"Yeah, everyone pretty much knows Logan," James said.

"How?" I asked.

"It's pretty obvious," Erica said. I felt embarrassed.

"Oh," I said.

"Don't' feel bad Logan," she continued. "He isn't mad at you or anything. He just isn't into you that way." As far as you know. . . .

"Okay," I said, wanting to change the subject. "You guys should go see Kendall. He was sleeping when I last saw him. Maybe he's up now."

"Yeah we should probably go straighten things out with him too. Make sure he knows it wasn't us who had the gun," James said. They got up and left after Erica hugged me one more time. Even if she isn't being honest, at least she's convincing. Her hugs were nice. All hugs are nice.

"Tell Kendall I said hi," I said. They nodded and left. My dad returned. We talked about nothing worth repeating for pretty much the rest of the day.

(Meanwhile)

**Kendall's POV**

Swirls of blue and gold cloud my vision as I try to open my eyes. Someone is holding my hand. Soft. My eyes managed to break free of the sandy grasp and are bombarded with sunlight. I turned my head to see Melissa holding my hand. She brushed the hair out of my eyes with her fingers. She looked upset. I thought I asked her what was wrong but I probably mumbled something totally incoherent because she didn't answer so I asked again.

"What's wrong?"

"Oh, Kendall," she sighed. "Logan is dead."


	19. Real Melissa

**A/N: Sorry it's been so long! Hope you all haven't forgotten about me! I've been pretty busy.**

**I added some of my social media links to my profile. You can check them out and follow/friend me if you want :) **

**But anyway, do you guys have any idea of who shot Kendall? Also, what's up with Melissa? What does she have planned? Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Don't own them**

**Kendall's POV**

"What?" I asked. Maybe I didn't hear her right.

"Don't make me say it again Kendall, please. It's too hard," she said. I'm so confused right now.

"I think, I think I'm on too high of a dosage right now," I said, rubbing my eyes.

"No, Kendall," she said. "It's true."

"How?" I asked, just above a whisper. "He wasn't hurt that bad."

"While you were out, Logan's mother showed up," she said. I was afraid to know the rest, but I needed to.

"Yeah. . . .and?" I said.

"She took him," she said.

"No," I said sitting up, kinda.

"I'm sorry Kendall," she said.

"What did she do to him?" I asked. She covered her face with her hands and cried. "What did she do? Please tell me! I need to know!"

"She broke his neck," she said. It felt like my body was falling. Like that feeling you get in your stomach when you're on a roller coaster.

"She did?" I asked sadly. She nodded her head. I silently let a few tears fall.

"Where is my mom?" I asked.

"She'll be back shortly. She went to tell Logan's father," she said.

"I don't believe this," I said sadly. Melissa rubbed my thigh.

"We should have just stayed home. We never should have gone out. He was nervous anyway. I should have just called my mom back to get us," I rambled.

"Shh, baby. It'll be alright," she said.

"He didn't deserve it," I said, my voice catching at the end of the sentence.

"You're right. He didn't," she said, sympathetically.

"I just feel so guilty," I said. I choked on my tears and winced in pain, gripping my side.

"Easy Kendall, you'll rip your stitches," she said.

"Stitches?" I asked. "How many do I have?"

"Seven," she said right off the bat. "I mean, six or seven. Or five. Actually I don't even know, just don't mind me. My mind is on other things."

"It's okay I understand. I didn't know you were this close to him though," I said.

"Of course I am," she said. "And I know he means a lot to you, and I know you're hurting. So I'm hurting." I nodded my head.

"How did my mother react?" I asked.

"She's really upset. It's best not to mention it to her when she gets back," she said.

"Really?" I asked. She nodded her head.

"Alright then," I said. There was a knock at the door. Melissa opened it and I wiped my eyes quickly.

"Kendall, you're up!" Erica said entering with James.

"Yeah," I said.

"How are you feeling?" James asked me.

"I'm alright I guess," I replied.

"Bro, I have no idea who did this to you," he said, sitting down in a chair beside me. I just looked at him. "I just wanna make sure you're okay."

"Yeah, I'm okay I guess. Just figure out who it was alright?" I asked.

"We'll try," Erica said. We sat in silence for a bit.

"Hey. . . .guys, I don't mean to be rude, but I really don't want visitors right now. I'd rather be alone," I said.

"Oh, alright Kendall," Erica said heading to me. She gave me a hug which I accepted. James shook my hand. "We'll see you later in the week." And they both left.

"Mel, no offense, but I really mean alone," I said. She looked shocked but agreed to leave.

"I'll be back in an hour alright?" she said. I nodded my head. When she left it's like a dam broke or something because I couldn't stop the tears from falling. I put my arm over my face and cried. I must have been loud because a few times multiple different nurses came in to check on me.

"I failed," I said miserably. I hated myself. I promised myself one thing: to make sure Logan lived a happier life, and I already failed. My mother entered the room and saw me crying.

"Baby, are you alright?" she asked. I nodded my head. "Are you sure?" I nodded again.

"Yeah, I'm just. . . .in pain," I said. She rubbed my side which felt kind of good actually.

"Everything will be okay hun," she said to me. She sat on my bed and hugged me tight and I snuggled into her. Sometimes it felt good to just do that. "I'm glad to see you're awake. I missed you."

"I missed you too," I said.

"Please stop getting into trouble," she said.

"Hey," I said. "I'm not too bad." She chuckled.

"I know. You're my baby," she said. "I don't say it much but I love you sweetie."

"You say it enough," I said.

"No, I don't," she said. "I could say it much more to you. I'm always so preoccupied with the girls that I really neglect my baby." She patted my hair down even though there's no fixing it. Bed hair at the extreme.

"It's fine mom," I said. We sat there for a while, her trying to mat down my hair, me trying to take in everything that's happened in the last 24 hours. Logan was in a fight. I jumped in. I pulled James off of Logan. James kicked me in the eye. I got shot. My ears rang. I fell asleep. I woke up. Logan is dead. My last memory of him isn't even a good one. I rested my head on my mother's shoulder. "Mom?"

"Yeah baby," she said.

"I know you don't really want to talk about this but I have some questions," I said.

"About what?" she asked.

"What's gonna happen to Logan's body?" I asked.

"His body?" she questioned.

"Yeah, like, what's gonna happen? Is he gonna get buried?" I asked.

"Get buried?"

"Yes! What are they gonna do with his body?" I asked, getting frustrated.

"What do you mean sweetie?" she asked.

"Ugh, never mind," I said.

"No honey, tell me," she said.

"No, that's okay. I know you don't want to talk about it," I said.

"No, no honey just tell me," she said.

"No, because I'm gonna start crying again," I said tearing up.

"About what sweetie?" she asked. She sounded so confused. "Why are you crying?" I wiped my eyes.

"I just feel guilty," I said.

"Why?" I asked.

"I could have done so much more to help him," I said miserably.

"No," she cooed. "You did more than enough."

"But I failed," I said.

"No you didn't. He's gonna be fine," she said. "He's more worried about you."

"What?" I asked, blinking away tears.

"He'll be okay. It's just a broken leg dear, you've had one," she said.

"He's alive?" I asked.

"Of course he is honey. He's fine. Everyone is okay hun," she said.

"But Melissa told me Logan died," I said. She looked confused.

"Really? I don't know why. I told her that he was fine. And I told her to tell you when you woke up that he's fine and not to worry," she said.

"He's okay?" I asked.

"Yes, baby." She hugged me tight and I cried into her chest.

"I can't believe it," I said. "I was so worried."

"He can come see you today. I know he's been dying to see you," my mother said.

"Why would Melissa tell me he died?" I asked.

"Honestly dear, I have no clue," she said. "Maybe she was just confused."

"Yeah, maybe."

(Later)

My mother is getting Logan right now and I have to say, I'm really happy to see him. I still don't know why Melissa would lie to me like that. She hasn't returned either. She texted me saying her mother needed her to do the grocery shopping. Logan entered the room in a wheelchair steered by my mother, with Logan's dad following behind.

"Kendall, you're okay!" he said.

"I'm alright Logan," I confirmed. My mother wheeled him over to me and he kind of hugged me. We both whined of pain though which was kind of funny.

"I've been waiting for you to wake up," he said. "I wanted to say sorry."

"Why?" I asked.

"Because whenever you're around me you get hurt. I think I'm a jinx," he said.

"You're not a jinx," I said. "It's just a coincidence. Plus I'm gonna be fine. I think I only have to stay here a few days."

"I can't wait till we go home," he said.

"Me too," I said. "Hey, how's your neck?"

"My neck?" he asked.

"Yeah. How does it feel?" I asked.

"It feels. . . .okay I guess," he said. He looked concerned.

"Good." He's smiling at me. He's so awkward sometimes. I would never tell him that though. I don't mean it in an offensive way. I know he would take it that way though.

"So, how are you feeling?" he asked me. "Are you in pain?"

"A little bit but I'll be okay," I told him. He frowned. "I promise."

(4 Days Later)

We're home now thankfully. I couldn't sleep much in the hospital. My mom wants me to stay at home because she doesn't think I'll get enough rest at Melissa's house. Logan's gonna stay at my house while his dad goes to his therapy sessions. I'm out of school for the week while I recover but Logan still has to go. He's been nervous every day this week and begs my mom to let him stay but she insists that he still go.

"You want any lunch dear?" my mother asked, coming into my room. "I can order some food."

"Sure," I said.

"What are you drawing?" she said. I was sitting upright with my back against the wall and had my sketchpad in my hand.

"Just something," I said vaguely. She came over and sat next to me on my bed. I didn't like when she hovered over me, but I know she just was curious. It was just a person in a room with bats flying everywhere.

"Interesting," she said, taking my sketchpad.

"Mom," I said.

"No, really. It's museum worthy," she said holding it above her head.

"Yeah right," I said laughing, trying to take it back.

"This should be on the fridge," she said getting up.

"No. Mom, give it back," I said. I must have reached over too far because a shooting pain shot up my left side.

"Oh. Dear be careful," she said. She must have noticed I wasn't kidding. I gripped my side and squeezed my eyes closed.

"I'll be fine. I just need…to sit here for a while," I said. I rolled onto my left side, still holding. My mom put my sketchpad on the bed and came over to me.

"Are you sure you're okay? It's been a few days, you shouldn't be hurting like this," she said.

"I'm fine, mom," I said. "I promise." I sat up and rested my back against the wall again.

"You sure?" she asked me.

"Yeah," I said. The pain subsided and I opened my eyes a bit.

"Okay. What do you feel like for lunch?" she asked me.

"Um, not sure. Doesn't matter I guess," I said.

"How about sandwiches?" she suggested.

"Alright," I said.

(Later)

Sandwiches are really good actually. Obviously I know that but today, this one just really hit the spot. It was big too. It was pretty much an entire wide loaf of warm Italian bread loaded with turkey, ham, bacon, cheese, lettuce, tomato, peppers, and mayo. I had potato chips and fruit on the side, and water to drink. I could probably eat more too to be honest, but my mother only bought 3 sandwiches; one for me, and two for everyone else to split. Still. . . .

"Mom?" I yelled. A few minutes later she came upstairs.

"What's up hun?" she asked.

"I'm still hungry," I said.

"You are?" she asked.

"Yeah," I said. I swiped my finger across my empty bowl of potato chips to pick up any loose crumbs.

"Well, I'll make dinner in a few hours, think you can wait till then?" she asked me.

"Maybe," I said. She left my room and I licked my fingers clean of any stray crumbs.

"Hi Kendall!" Logan said entering my room.

"Hey Loges. How was school?" I asked, putting the clearly empty bowl on the chair next to my bed.

"It was okay. I miss you being there though," he said. I smiled.

"I'll be there probably next week," I said.

"Yay," he said. My phone vibrated. "Who's that?"

"Not sure," I said. I picked up my phone from my side table. "It's a text from Melissa."

"What does she want?" he asked.

"_Kendall, how are you feeling? Is your mom coping well?" _I read out loud.

"Coping?" he asked.

"Yeah, I don't really know what that means," I said interrupting him. I texted back.

_I'm pretty good. btw remember when u said Logan was dead? He's not. And his neck seems fine to me._

"So, how was your day?" he asked me.

"It was alright. Pretty normal I guess," I said.

"Yeah, what did you do?" he asked.

_M: Really? He must have healed fast then. How is he?_

"I just sat here pretty much. I was downstairs watching TV for a bit, then I came up here and drew, then I had lunch, and then you came home," I explained while responding to Melissa.

"Oh," he said nodding. "What is she saying?"

"Not much," I said.

_K: I don't think he was ever hurt that bad. He only has a broken leg. & my mom seemed to have no knowledge of his mom coming._

_K: Neither he nor my mom mentioned anything._

"You seem a little distracted," he said. "I'll just go downstairs."

"No it's alright," I said. "Actually can I ask you something?"

"Of course," he said.

"While I was out, how were you?" I asked.

"I was okay, I guess, just worried about you. You looked so hurt when I came to see you," he said.

"Yeah," I said. "Did your mom ever come by?"

"My mom?" he asked hesitantly.

"Yeah," I said.

"No. Why? Is she out of jail?" he asked. He's panicking.

"No no, calm down," I said.

"Why would you bring that up then?" he asked.

"Well, Melissa told me your mom got a hold of you," I said.

"Why would she say that? That's not true," he assured me.

"I don't know," I said.

"Well, Melissa doesn't want us to be friends. Maybe that's why? Maybe she thought if you thought my mom was around again, you wouldn't want to be my friend," he said.

"Why doesn't she want us to be friends?" I asked. "That seems weird."

"She has a really big crush on you," he said.

"No way, how do you know?" I asked.

"She told me. Remember the night I talked to you on her porch?" I nodded my head. "When she brought me home she told me she doesn't want us talking anymore because 'you are hers'."

"That's ridiculous. I can't believe she feels that way about me. I kinda feel bad," I said.

"Why do you feel bad for her? She was so mean to me!" he said.

"Really?" I asked.

"Yeah. She told me to never talk to you again. And she threw my cheesecake on the ground," he said.

"Well, why did you never tell me she treated you this way?" I asked. He shrugged his shoulders.

"Because I didn't want to ruin your friendship I guess. You two were friends first," he said.

"So? You're my friend too. And if she doesn't like that she's just gonna have to deal with it," I said.

"Kendall, I really don't want to interfere with your friendships," he told me.

"You're not interfering," I said. "You're part of it." He smiled. "I'll text her right now."

"What are you gonna say?" he asked.

"I dunno. I'll just bring it up nonchalantly," I said.

_K: hey, so did u by any chance tell me Logan died because you don't want me to hang around him?_

_M: no why would you think that?_

"She says, 'no why would you think that,'" I said.

"She's lying Kendall," he said.

_K: because you said he was dead and he's fine_

(silence)

"So Logan, you're good at school and stuff right?" I asked.

"Yeah, I guess so Kendall," he said modestly. He smiled big.

_M: I don't know what to say…I really thought his mother came by._

"She says she doesn't know what to say, she really thinks your mom came by," I said.

"Kendall, I promise you I'm fine. If my mother came by, you'd be the first person I'd tell. Believe me, not her please,' he said.

"I believe you buddy," I said.

_K: I know ur lying Mel. Just tell the truth. I promise I won't get mad._

"So, since you're like, good at school and grades and stuff, would you mind tutoring me? So I don't get kicked off the hockey team?" I asked. If smiles could get bigger, his did.

"Yeah Kendall. Of course I will," he said. "I'd be so happy to."

"Good," I said.

_M: ok. Im sorry. I just don't like u hanging around with his type. I didn't wanna say anything but it makes u look bad. Im just trying to protect u._

I looked at the text and decided to not tell Logan what she said. I can't believe she would judge someone like that.

_K: it's wrong to judge like that Mel. Logan's really cool. So what if he's different, I think its cool._

"So, do you want to start now?" Logan asked me.

"Start what?" I asked.

"The tutoring. We took a bunch of notes on phenotypes and genotypes in biology. And we had a seminar discussion about the development of first, second, and third world countries in geography," he said.

"Sounds like I missed a lot," I said.

"But don't worry. You'll get it," he said reassuringly.

"Are you sure it's the same even though we're not in the same classes?" I asked.

"More or less," he said.

_M: I thought you said you weren't gonna get mad_

_K: im not mad. I just think it's wrong to judge someone based on their sexuality. It doesn't bother me so why should you care?_

_M: I care what people say about you because ur my friend._

_K: if u were my friend u would respect who im friends with_

_M: Kendall im trying to be nice but ur making that really hard. If u want to hang around him fine. Just don't expect to see me much or stay at my house_

"What is she saying now?" Logan piped in.

"Oh nothing. I'm talking to James," I said. He nodded his head.

_K: if ur really gonna be that immature about it then fine. Ill stay here_

_M: I cant believe ur choosing him over me_

_K: im not choosing him over anybody. Im not choosing anyone over anybody. We can both still be friends_

_M: that is so not happening Kendall. Im sorry but I will not do that to myself. Have fun with your boyfriend_

"Is she still not saying anything?" he asked.

"She doesn't want to be my friend as long as I'm your friend," I said.

"Oh," he said sadly. "I understand."

"She's just gonna have to deal with it," I said.

"Kendall, you've been friends with her way longer than you have been friends with me. I don't want to interfere," he said. "You guys have pictures of each other from kindergarten."

"I know. . . .but she's being childish right now. I'm sure she'll realize this and get over it. No biggie Logan," I explained. He still looked unconvinced. "You gonna tutor me or what?"

"Yeah," he said.

_K: u do realize ur being a baby right?_

_M: im sorry who is this?_

**I hope to get back in the swing of things soon and update more often now :) Hope you liked this one! Review?**


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